


In The Beginning

by T8037



Category: The Good Doctor (TV 2017)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-21
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:35:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 34,941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21886792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/T8037/pseuds/T8037
Summary: The relationship from the start of the residency. First posted on FFN in May 2019.
Relationships: Audrey Lim/Neil Melendez
Comments: 15
Kudos: 35





	1. Chapter 1

"My name is Dr Aaron Glassman" the older man announced from the head if the table. "I will be your main point of contact for the duration of your residency."

The six new surgical residents sat around the conference table with their welcome packs in front of them. They looked at him intently as he directed then to open their booklets to the first page.

"As well as being resident supervisor, I am also the neurosurgery attending here" he continued. "I trained here at St Bonaventure and have been lucky enough to stay on to progress in my career."

"St Bonaventure is an emerging centre of excellence for both medical and surgical programs and you have all been chosen as we believe you are the best of the best." The new residents smiled and seemed to relax a little at that.

"First things first" Dr Glassman announced. "Introductions. Let's start to my left and work our way around."

A young man spoke first. He was dressed in a smart suit with a matching tie and pocket square. "Hello there, I'm Dr Kevin Miller. I went to Columbia and I'd like to specialise in plastic surgery. I'm not married, have no children that I know of and am focused on getting the most out of this residency" he said with no change in his expression.

"I'm Joanne Walker" said the next resident in line who was a young lady, dressed impeccably. "I went to Perelman. I'm not sure if my speciality yet and am looking forward to trying out a few options" she said smiling at the room.

"I'm Audrey Lim. I went to Stanford" said a young lady in a cotton shirt and a pair of jeans.

"Anything else you'd like to Dr Lim?" Dr Glassman prompted.

"Not right now" Dr Lim replied. Glassman nodded.

"Next!"

"I'm Delun Chen" started a young man dressed in slacks and a collared t-shirt. "I attended Columbia also. I think I'd like to specialize in cardiothoracic surgery."

"I'm Neil Melendez and I attended UCSF. I'm leaning towards either emergency medicine or cardiothoracic" he said with an air of confidence. He was wearing the trousers and shirt that would one day become his uniform outside of his scrubs.

Lastly was another young man dressed in creased trousers and an untucked shirt. "My name is Dr Alex Perry. I'm looking forward to getting started and using my skills to help people" he said with a smile.

"Great, now that is out of the way, it's time to get down to business" Dr Glassman continued. "The are six of you now, but by the end of your first year, the will only be four places to move forward. You will be assessed the whole time on your skills across a wide range from technical to patient contact"

"Feel free to get acquainted, make friends even, but remember, you are competing with each other and some of you will lose" he finished and dismissed them for a coffee break.

X

After taking a bathroom break, the residents gathered around the coffee urns set up in a small foyer outside the conference room.

Neil took a sip and discreetly spat it back into the cup grimacing.

"This stuff is nasty. I'm going to head to the lobby, anyone else want anything?"

'No thanks' was the most common reply apart from Audrey.

"Yeah, sure. I'll come with" she said gesturing towards the elevator.

Neil pressed the call button and stood back, and as the doors opened he gestured 'after you' and Audrey took the lead.

As they descend, he tried to start up conversation with the seemingly quiet Dr Lim.

"So, you didn't share much in there. What are you hoping to specialise in? Or are you keeping your options open?"

"I didn't share then, I'm not sharing now" she replied with a small smile. "I'm not here to make friends" she stated in a matter of fact.

He raised his eyebrows. "Sorry, I'll try to remember that in future" he replied.

They exited into the lobby and headed towards the coffee counter.

"Am I allowed to offer to buy you a coffee? As a colleague of course, not as potential friend" he teased.

She looked and shook her head with a small smile. "I don't see why not" she replied.

Their order arrived quickly and with their cups of decent coffee in hand, they exited the elevator back onto the floor outside the conference room. All the other residents were already sat around the table and their heads swivelled as Neil and Audrey entered.

"There you are" Dr Glassman stated. "I see you've figured out the key to surviving at St Bonaventure already" he said gesturing towards the coffee cups.

"Sorry..." Neil started but Audrey interrupted.

"That coffee was awful" she said nodding towards the foyer. "Wouldn't have survived the afternoon on that."

"Understood" Dr Glassman said and gave a small smile. "Next time though, make sure you look after your attending please."

X

After running through the welcome pack, discussing safety and evacuation protocols and getting through the last pieces of admin, they were released for a lunch break.

"Take advantage" Dr Glassman advised them. "This is probably the least scheduled lunch you will ever have. Enjoy it" he says with a laugh.

They sat together at a table in the cafeteria making small talk. They learned a few more snippets of information quickly each other mostly regarding their supposed prowess.

Audrey stayed quiet and observed, making her own judgements. She looked at Kevin as he regaled them with yet another story about how he had met someone famous and how they promised to come to him for work once he was qualified. Granted, his suit was expensive but it covered a shallow, self important man.

Joanne was genuinely keen to learn. She appeared to be very intelligent but didn't necessarily have the skills to specialise on one particular field. Audrey thought she might be more suited to general practise.

She looked over at Delun as he told a story about something unimportant that started out well, but went horribly wrong. He doesn't have the discipline for a cardio speciality, she thought. He's not focused enough.

She silently critiqued Alex next. He seemed like he actually wanted to help people. No ulterior motives, no self gain. Just wanted to help. She found herself hoping he had the skills to back it up.

Lastly came Neil. She didn't quite know what to make of him. He was very handsome and had an air of arrogance but also seemed genuinely nice. His interests were at polar opposites of each other. Trauma surgery was fast paced and often messy, whereas cardiothoracic was meticulous and precise. He would be an interesting one.

Neil cleared his throat and Audrey snapped too. She hadn't noticed the rest of the residents clear their trays and leave. It was just the two of them and he had caught her staring.

"You ok?" he asked.

"Yeah" she replied. "Just sizing you all up" she said with a smile as she picked up her tray and headed back towards the elevators.

Neil sat a moment longer. He didn't know what to make of Audrey Lim so far. The rest of them were pretty easy to read but she was something else. She was going to be his biggest competition he thought. Should be fun, he smiled to himself.


	2. Chapter 2

Once orientation was complete, they were handed their scrubs, white coats and were thrown straight in the deep end. It was going to be sink or swim, there was no doubt about it.

She clearly remembers the first time she saw him in his scrubs. The navy suited him and they allowed her to noticed a detailed tattoo on his forearm. She wondered if there was meaning behind it and would try to remember to ask one day.

His white coat gave him confidence. He wore it proudly and carried himself with an air of authority despite the fact that he had only been on the job five minutes. She noticed it seemed to put the patients at ease and watched mindfully.

His bedside manner was faultless, he seemed to have a connection with each patient, particularly the children. One youngster in the ER who was particularly distressed spotted something about Neil that interested her.

She pointed at his collar saying "What dat?"

"Ah, that is a picture" he smiled.

"Of who?" the child asked.

"Bambis daddy" he replied moving his collar slightly for the youngster to see.

"Aww, that's cute" said the little girl.

"Thank you" Neil smiled.

Stood at the nurses station a little later writing up his notes, he jumped a little when Audrey stepped up beside him.

"Bambis daddy?" She asked with an amused look.

"Nah, just a misguided youth" he laughed. "High school team was The Bucks" he shrugged.

'Maybe he's not such a Mr. Nice Guy after all' she thought.

X

He remembers very well the first time he saw her in scrubs. There had been an admission via the ER of a construction worker who had impaled his upper thigh on some rebar after a stumble.

Audrey had steadfastly held the leg stable without flinching, even as the patient had been thrashing around in pain. As her 'reward' she was the first of them to be invited into the Operating Room to observe.

He saw her immediately afterwards and she was gliding down the corridor as if she was walking on air. Her hair was pulled back into a high bun and she was buzzing with excitement.

"Went well then?" Neil asked as she got closer.

"That was amazing" she exclaimed. Her entire face lit up when she smiled as she began to recount the events of the last few hours. The detail she went into was immense and he almost felt at if he was there.

That was the most they had spoken in the time they had known each other and he enjoyed the conversation thoroughly. From their first meeting in the conference room and her succinct introduction, he thought that might have been the way she was going to be but now he realised, you just needed to find something that she was excited about. Surgery was it.

She was going to be his biggest competition.

X

Their stamina was challenged over the weeks that followed as they started obscenely long shifts and the limits of their knowledge were constantly tested. They were called to every type of consult they could have imagined and did scut work for the senior residents.

Dr Glassman had been right all those weeks ago. None of them could remember sitting down for as lunch break any time recently, they would stuff a sandwich down their throats running between one call and another.

The pressure seemed to be just about bearable for most of them however Delun was showing signs of being stressed after a fumbled intubation. He had tried and failed at the first attempt and he had walked out of the room when the attending took the apparatus and completed the procedure instead of allowing him a second try.

He had been chewed out afterwards and was now sitting in the locker room with his head in his hands. Neil found him sitting there an hour after he should have left the hospital.

"Do you want to grab a drink?" Neil asked. "Talk about what happened today?"

"I dunno" he replied. "I don't really feel like it" he said miserably.

"Come on, it was one failed attempt at intubating a guy. Let it go and just do better next time. You've done them before as a med student, it's not like it was your first go" Neil said.

"It was" he whispered.

"Pardon? How?"

"I've just never stepped up before but when he asked today, I didn't really have a choice."

"Wow" Neil said quietly.

"I got the blade in just fine and I could see the epiglottis. I just slid the tube down and I KNEW I was in, I was sure of it."

"So what happened?"

"When they pulled the guide wire, the tube came up a bit and the bag wouldn't inflate. I wanted to try again but he just took it off me and did it himself. I'm sure it was the nurse, I'm sure she didn't inflate the cuff once the tube was in" Delun said shaking his head.

Neil was a little shocked at his version of events. He sat for a moment trying to think of the right thing to say.

"At least you were allowed to attempt" he started. "It's important to get this shit right first time. The patient had already had the relaxant, it needed to be done. He just didn't want to waste any more time. And one piece of solid advice I've been given is to not slate the nurses. They'll save your ass more times than you can count."

Delun sighed. "You're right, sorry for putting this on you."

"Not at problem. Shall I see if the rest are still here? We could go get a drink? "

"That would be great, yes please."

Five of them went out to a bar after work that night. Kevin was staying behind to research for an upcoming procedure so they said their goodbyes and headed out.

They all drowned Deluns sorrows and toasted for the next shift to be better. Each of them left the bar that night thinking they were part of a team and thinking that they might even be making friends.


	3. Chapter 3

The residents spent the next few months settling into their new routines of having no routine whatsoever. Their lives belonged to the hospital and they worked harder than they ever had before.

They had started to bond as a team and would regularly arrange to go out together to let off steam. This particular Wednesday, there were four of them heading to dinner. Neil offered to drive, vaguely explaining that he needed to be up early in the morning so would just have one beer.

Doctors Chen and Perry couldn't make it this time around. They were still monitoring a patient that had developed complications during a simple procedure. The rest of them went off to a local, cheap and cheerful bar to get dinner and drinks.

His car was a battered old Ford but it got him where he needed to go. As they got in, Kevin moved a pile of CDs from the passenger seat. Looking through them as they drove, he blurted "Who is Gabi? You didn't say you had a girlfriend Melendez!"

Neil laughed "Kev, she's my sister" and watched as a blush crept up Kevins cheeks.

"Ah, you share the car?"

Neil looked over at him and smiled. After a slightly rocky start, Kevin had settled in well over the last few months. Despite his very impersonal introduction, his personal skills had improved a lot so Neil decided to throw the guy a bone.

"Nah, she likes to choose the music when I take her out that's all." He paused briefly. "She's in a residential home about 30 minutes from here. She needs full time care."

The admission was met with silence from all three passengers. Nobody knew how to respond.

"It's fine, she's doing really well there and she's got great friends" he continued.

"Why is she in there?" Kevin asked. The question earned him a clip in the back of the head from Audrey which didn't go unnoticed.

"We were messing around when we were kids and she fell. Hit her head so hard it left permanent damage. It's not degenerative, but my parents were getting older and finding it all a bit much so there wasn't much choice."

As if on cue, they arrived away the bar and parked at the kerbside. Audrey hung back as Neil locked the car to walk in with him.

"Was that ok? The conversation in the car" she asked.

"Sure, why would you think otherwise?"

"You've never mentioned her before, that's all."

"Nobody really asked" he smiled as he held the door for her to walk through.

X

They were seated at a booth towards the back of the bar. As it was a Wednesday, it was not particularly busy so their server came by quickly. They placed their orders and started chatting and comparing stories since their last get together.

Kevin had the story of the night that made them all laugh until their eyes watered. "So, I get a call about an patient who needs a CBC to be checked but nursing cannot get blood" he began. "They have been trying throughout the day without success so trying to think out of the box, I headed to the NICU for some supplies."

"I had to do some serious begging but i convinced the nurse to give me a capillary puncture kit and headed to the ward with my victorious solution in my hand" he gestured raising his glass.

Joanne put her head in her hands "I can't bear this. Come on Kevin, how did you manage to mess it up?" she laughed.

"Patience now, I've got to build the suspense" he laughed. "I begin speaking to the family explaining what the kit was, how it was normally used on babies and how I was going to use it on the patient."

"I pushed the button to demonstrate and it dawns on me that I was holding it backwards. I rush out of the room and go to the sink. My finger just wouldn't stop bleeding."

At this point both Audrey and Joanne were almost crying and Neil was sat with a shocked look on his face.

"A nurse comes rushing over, takes one look and asks "Do you need a band aid?" I had to go back to the NICU, explain what had happened while they all had a good laugh and beg for another kit."

"It was a good idea, Kev" Audrey said through the tears that were flowing freely.

"Ah no" he replied. "Worst bit was, I didn't totally believe them when they said he was dry so I stuck his finger feeling like a hero for figuring this out and nothing. Stuck it again. Nothing. The man doesn't even give a drop, he was as dry as a bone" he laughed

They found the time they spent telling these stories therapeutic and sharing their failures made them closer as a team.

X

After the check was paid, Neil rose and said his goodbyes. He explained that he was heading out early in the morning to pick up Gabi so needed to be fresh.

Audrey decided to call it a night and asked if he wouldn't mind dropping her closer to home. Of course, he was happy to oblige.

Kevin and Joanne watched them leave and with a few beers giving her courage, Joanne turned and said "I give them six months."

"For what?" Kevin replied.

"They'll have slept together in six months time" she said laughing to herself. "They are always looking at each other when they think the other one isn't looking. It's so obvious!"

"I'll take that bet" Kevin said holding out his hand to seal the deal.

X

Oblivious to the conversation back at the booth, Neil and Audrey walked to the car. Ever the gentleman, he reached to open the door for her accidentally brushing her hand as she reached to do the same.

They jumped at the spark they felt and stood, staring at each other not knowing what to do next. Audrey's eyes flickered down to his mouth as Neil's tongue absent mindedly moistened his lips. He leaned a little closer and she didn't back away. Her gave her a small smile and leaned closer again.

This time, as their lips were millimetres apart, he heard "Stop, I can't" escape under her breath.

He backed away as if he'd been struck by lightning, apologising and opening the car door as was the original intention.

They drove in silence to the end of Audreys block and she asked him to stop the car.

"I can take you to the kerb" he teased. "I won't try any funny business, I promise" he said with a nervous laugh.

Audrey looked apprehensive and replied "it's fine, I can walk from here."

"It's no problem" he argued back.

"It is" she said as she opened the car door. "My husband won't like it. I'm sorry."

She closed the car door and Neil watched as she walked away, both of them feeling emotions they hadn't felt before.


	4. Chapter 4

The next time he saw her, she was surrounded by books and journals in one of the meeting rooms. There was a big procedure coming up and she was looking to get a spot on the team.

He had noticed she'd been holed up in there all morning on what should have been her day off so he had picked up a coffee for her. Besides, he wanted to catch her alone to apologise for that awkward moment a couple of days before.

He put the takeaway cup down in front of her, startling her and making her curse.

"Sorry" he said sheepishly. "I thought you heard me come in."

"Well, I was concentrating" she replied sharply, gesturing at the paperwork surrounding her.

"Can you take a break? I'd like to apologise for our misunderstanding?" Neil asked recovering quickly from the snipe.

"You don't need to..." she started but he carried in quickly.

"I misread the situation, I'm sorry. I don't know what I was thinking and if I'd known you were married I would have never..."

It was Audrey's turn to interrupt. "You couldn't have known I'm married" she smiled softly. "Nobody knows except HR."

"Can I ask you a question" Neil braved. She nodded her response.

"Why don't you wear a wedding ring?"

She sighed and marked the page of the journal she was reading before she closed it. "I'm not really sure" she admitted. "I wear our outside of work, just not at the hospital. I thought I might get treated differently if people knew. You know, because I'm a woman, people will assume I'm going to disappear in a couple of years to pop out a bunch of children. "

"And he doesn't mind?"

"Kashal. His name is Kashal" she replied. "And he doesn't mind, he's all about the career and how to move onward and upward."

"What does he do?" Neil asked.

"He's a lawyer" she replied. She didn't go into any more detail.

Neil didn't need telling twice that this was the end of that particular conversation so her changed the subject to keep her engaged.

"Need a study buddy for next weeks op?" he offered with a smile.

"I'll be ok, thanks for the coffee though. I needed that."

"Any time" he smiled ad he got up to leave. "Don't work too hard" he teased as he headed towards the door.

X

Audrey successfully got herself into the OR to observe the procedure in the following week. The operation itself was considered a success. The patient had suffered some major abdominal trauma and the procedure was intended to make repairs.

As the procedure came to a end, the decision was made to leave the wound open. It was covered in plastic and sealed with a vacuum and the closure would be made once he was less sick.

The events that followed made for a very entertaining tale the next time they went out a few weeks later.

The six of them were sat around a table getting dinner. They were grabbing a quick bite before heading out to a bar to relieve the stress of the month that just passed.

Audrey held the floor with a great story of the aftermath of the abdominal surgery. They all knew something had gone awry but none of them knew the details.

After giving a recap, she delved into the gory details.

"The nurse called me into the room to look at this guys abdomen because she thought she saw pieces of the bowel seeping out of the vacuum bag. I thought she was right, the bowel looked pretty dusky, so we called someone to come and take a look at it."

The senior resident marched in like he owned the place. He agreed with our assessment and talked to his attending who told him to take the dressing off, tuck the bowel back into the bag and put a new dressing on."

Alex looked horrified at the whole thing. "That sounded like it was going to be a disaster. Why did they think that was a good idea?"

The table laughed and Audrey continued.

"So, the genius resident, who shall remain nameless, comes in and takes off the dressing. The bowel had become swollen from the fluids and trauma, so when he took it off, they all just slipped."

"No way" cringed Delun. "That's awful!"

"It was pretty horrific to be honest. The bag had dislodged and as we tucked everything in one side, they'd spill back out the other. Luckily the guy was so out of it he had no idea and the drugs we'd given to control his BP meant there wasn't much blood. But there was just sooooo much mess, he was literally disembowelling and they was nothing we could do!"

"And the grand finale? How'd it end up?" Kevin asked.

"We ended up having to calling as many people as we could to tuck things in here and there until he could get back to the OR for them to get put back properly…... they closed him up this time and the guy went home two weeks later none the wiser" she laughed.

"You know these aren't the dinner conversations of normal people, you know?" Neil joked. "Imagine people could hear us, they'd never visited a doctor again" he laughed.

X

Conversation at the table took a lighter tone as the evening moved on. They check was paid and they were heading to a bar down the street for the rest of the evening.

As they ambled down the sidewalk, the topic of the hospital gala came up.

"Are we allowed to bring a date?" Delun asked.

"I doubt it" Neil replied. "I doubt we're even allowed to speak to anybody" he laughed.

Kevin and Joanne waltzed dramatically in front of them, spinning and laughing down the street. "Don't worry Del, I'll dance with you" shouted Joanne. "Come on, let's get some practice in" as she made a dramatic entrance in to the bar.

As always, Neil and Audrey were at the back of the group talking quietly.

"I'm going to try and let my paperwork overrun that night. Not sure a Gala is my scene" Audrey said as they strolled along.

"Not into dressing up fancy once in a while?" Neil teased.

She gestured to herself, dressed in her usual jeans, t-shirt and sneakers. "Do I look like I like dressing up?" she asked laughing. "Do you have a tux? I could ask Kash if he could loan you one if you wanted?"

Neil looked, not quite sure how to respond so didn't answer directly. "Come on, let's go dance" he said, grabbing her hand, pulling her through the door of the bar and straight onto the dancefloor.

"There they go again" Joanne shouted in Kevins ear. "Nothing going on, my foot!"

They danced away for a good hour before stopping for a drink. He took her hand again and guided her through the crowds to the bar. Neither of them noticed the guys stood to one side, casually snapping a photograph of them as they passed.

The night came to a close as they all stumbled out into the street. They called cabs and the guys waited until the ladies were on their way before they headed home themselves.

The last thing Neil remembered before his head hit the pillow that night, was how much fun he'd had with Audrey. He was going to have to get over this. This could be trouble.


	5. Chapter 5

The day of the gala came around quickly. The residents had been briefed that they were expected to attend and their only job was to impress the hospital's wealthy donors.

They ladies had argued a little saying it was easier for the boys to get ready, all they had to do was throw on a tux. Joanne had tried to get out an hour early, highlighting that it took women a lot longer to get ready. Especially in a hospital with no facilities.

"Not a chance" Dr Glassman said. "I'm sorry Dr Walker but your going to have to figure it out like everybody else. I'll expect to see you there at seven prompt."

"Great" she exclaimed as she burst into the locker room. "Just great."

Audrey was just grabbing something from her locker and startled as Joanne came hurling through the door.

"What's wrong?" she asked looking concerned.

"Dr Glassman won't let me finish early to get ready for tonight. So frustrating, he doesn't understand!"

"I'm sure he gets it Jo, he just isn't bothered" Audrey said trying to calm her friend. "Stop pacing, sit down" she said, trying to get her attention.

"I'll cover for you as much as I can while you get ready" Audrey suggested. "I'm not that fussed on going anyway so I'll just catch up with you all later.'

"Oh come on, you have to come" replied Jo. "Neil will be there in a tux, what other reason could you need!"

Audrey glared at her "Why would I want to see Neil in a tux?" she asked sharply.

"Touched a nerve there, have I?" Jo teased. "We all see you making eyes at each other. We've even opened a book to see how long it takes you to get together."

"You did what?!"

"Chill Audrey, it's just a joke. I'm sorry" she continued.

She sighed and took a deep breath. "Jo, I need to tell you something" she stated shakily. She gave her the entire run down of her marriage to Kashal. From how they met at school, to deciding to get married thinking they would go far together. She shared how Kashal wasn't the man she thought he was, how he was very controlling outside of work and how she would appreciate it if the gossip was stopped. She didn't want to get into trouble. On their nights out, she simply told him that she was working late.

Jo looked at her in utter disbelief. Sir couldn't believe that the cool and confident Audrey Lim was in that position.

"I'm sorry" was all she could utter. "It probably won't help, but if you ever need me, you have to let me know ok?"

Audrey gave a sad smile. "Thank you, Jo. That means a lot."

X

The rest of the shift ran it's course. Alex and Audrey were just finishing up the last of the charts and were going to get changed. The last patient consult had been amused by Joanne's attendance with a full face of makeup. As promised, Audrey completed the paperwork while she went to get ready.

7p.m. came and five of the six residents reported for duty in the hospital lobby. It had been miraculously transformed over the last 48 hours into a spectacular sight. There was a long bar down one side and the majority of the rest of the space was taken up by tall tables and strategically placed seating.

The five of them stood together around a table having their first drinks of the evening. They had been warned to behave themselves and not to take too much advantage of the free bar.

Audrey arrived a little late and stood watching from a vantage point for a short while. The men had scrubbed up well in their tuxedos. As expected, Kevin was immaculate and wore a beautiful, bespoke suit. Alex was at the other end of the scale and had been scolded by Joanne for not having ironed his shirt again. He was told that under no circumstances, should he remove his jacket. Delun looked very dapper in his tux and then there was Neil.

Neil looked so handsome. He wore a black tuxedo just like most of the other men in the room but he seemed to exude a confidence which made him more attractive than usual. It seemed that she wasn't the only one who noticed as he was approached by a couple of ladies while she watched.

He gave each of them his undivided attention and used his most dazzling smile to no doubt charm them. As the last lady moved on, he didn't turn back to the group. He lifted his chin slightly and looked straight into her eyes.

'Damn it' she cursed inwardly, she had been caught watching him.

He smiled and waved her over. She greeted each of them individually and as she leaned in to kiss Neil on the cheek he whispered in her ear.

"You look beautiful."

She felt herself blush and excused herself to go to the bar. Jo quickly followed behind.

"Are you ok, Aud?"

"Yeah, just need a drink" she laughed nervously.

X

The residents headed their separate ways through the evening as they mingled with donors and VIPs. It was a good opportunity for them to do some networking of their own. The profession was turning out to be as much about who you know, not just what you know.

As the evening drew to a close, they were gravitating back together and gathering around one of the tables near the bar. The men were stood nursing their last drinks of the evening watching the dancefloor with some interest when Audrey and Joanne returned.

"What's so interesting?" Jo asked with a smile.

"Neil dancing with someone under the age of fifty for the first time tonight" joked Kevin.

As they looked over, they saw Neil dancing with a tall blonde lady of a similar age. They were both smiling and chatting away as they swayed to the music.

"Who is that?" Audrey asked. "She's a bit young to be a donor."

"That is the granddaughter of the hospital founder, Jessica Preston. Law student by all accounts." Alex confirmed.

"She must be nice" Delun joked. "He's lasted more than one song with this one!"

Jo glanced over at Audrey to try and gauge her reaction but she remained stoic. After another ten minutes, she checked her watch and said her goodbyes to the group.

She didn't disturb Neil and his dancing partner and headed outside to wait for her lift. Kashal would arrive soon to drive her home.

X

As she stood waiting away from the front doors, she spotted movement as more people made to leave. Walking out of the building arm in arm were Neil and Jessica talking and laughing as they went.

She stepped back into the shadow not wanting to be seen. She watched as they crossed the car park and headed to a shiny new car parked in one of the many rows.

Just then Kashal pulled up kerbside, wound down the window and called to get her attention. She got in the passenger seat, leaning over to kiss his cheek.

"Hi" Kash said with a smile. "Did you enjoy?"

"It was ok. Good to meet some new contacts" she replied stiffly.

He pulled away from the kerb and they headed home in their usual silence. She couldn't help her mind wandering to Neil and thinking where he was going tonight.

If she'd watched a moment or two longer she would have seen him walk Jessica to her car. She kissed his cheek and gave him her card while they made casual arrangements to meet up next time she was in town.

After making sure she was underway, he headed back to the reception. He stopped at the crosswalk and was sure he saw Audrey getting into a dark sedan and pulling away on the other side of the parking lot.

He found his thoughts going straight back to Audrey and feeling a little disappointed that he didn't get to dance with her tonight.


	6. Chapter 6

It was a couple of days before Neil saw Audrey again, their shifts just didn't seem to align. He was sitting in the on-call room getting teased by Kevin and Alex about his success with the ladies at the Gala. As Audrey and Joanne joined them, it seemed the conversation was picking up the pace.

"I bet nearly all the donations came from ladies you danced with Melendez" Alex laughed.

"Just doing my job" Neil answered dryly. "Most of them were trying to marry me off to their granddaughters" he laughed.

"You didn't need any help there either" joked Alex. "That pretty little lady from the end of the night? Looking for a bit if rough was she?!"

"Can we drop this please?" he said sharply, glancing at Audrey, an act that didn't go unnoticed by most of the group.

"Sure, sorry" said Alex. "That was too much."

"What's on the roster for today?" Kevin asked changing the subject. "I hear Chen has an appendectomy. Maybe even get his hands dirty."

The conversation change didn't seem to lift the mood between them so they made their excuses and went off to collect their first assignments for the day.

Neil hung back a moment to try and catch Audrey, he wanted to explain what she thought she might have seen at the end of the Gala.

Before he spoke, she jumped in.

"Think you'll see her again?" she looked shocked at herself for even asking and immediately apologised. "Sorry, it's none of my business."

"It's ok" Neil said trying to make things less awkward. "She's a law student on the East Coast, she's gone back to school. Maybe we'll catch up when she comes home next, maybe not."

"I'm sorry, it's really not my business. I shouldn't pry" she said as she turned to leave.

He put his hand out to stop her and she turned on a sixpence.

"I thought friends could talk about this stuff?" he asked. "We're friends right?"

"Absolutely" she smiled and walked out.

He sighed and leaned heavily against the wall and jumped as Joanne came bursting back in to pick up her cell phone.

"You ok Melendez?" she asked.

"Sure" he replied rubbing his hand over her face.

"You know she feels something too, right" she continued. "She just can't..."

"I know she's married, it's ok. I understand."

"Ok smartass, you think you know everything. But do you know she's not happy" she said.

"I didn't" he admitted, feeling more conflicted than before. After Jo had explained some of her situation, he really didn't know what to do.

"Just think about that for a while" Jo said on her way out of the door.

X

Later that shift, they finally caught up with Delun. Kevin and Neil found him in the locker room, once again, with his head in his hands.

"Where have you been Del, thought you had an appy today?" Kevin asked.

"I screwed up so badly this time" he said in a panicked voice.

"It can't have been that bad" Neil encouraged. "What happened?"

"I dropped it?" Delun said quietly.

"Dropped what? Come on man, we can't help you unless you talk to us."

He lifted his head and looked up at them with despair.

"I dropped the appendix" he said shakily.

"That's not so bad" Neil replied. "He didn't need it anyway."

"Inside the cavity" he continued.

They both looked at him unsure of what to say so Kevin piped up first.

"How?"

"Well, our was going ok" he started. "The beginning of the surgery went fine and I cut it cleanly. Just when I was trying to remove it, I dropped it back inside" he said trying to hold in his tears.

"We ended up operating just over 4 hours because they couldn't find it. Four hours, stood there like an idiot on suction. They must think I'm useless" he said with a sigh.

"On your feet" Kevin demanded and Delun obeyed. "Get changed, we're going for a drink. Neil will join us when he's finished, won't you Neil?"

"Sure thing, go get a head start and I'll join you. I could do with a drink too."

As promised, two hours later, Neil caught up with them at a bar down the street. They had already had a few drinks and were being loud and generally debaucherous. He decided against playing catch up and looking at Delun, decided he'd be the responsible one and make sure he got home.

X

He clearly remembers the first time he saw her in public not in the company of the other residents. She was sat in a booth with a man who he assumed was Kashal. He was taking animatedly while she sat and listened, appearing to smile and laugh when required.

He had watched Audrey Lim laugh plenty of times and what she was doing now was not sincere. When she laughed, her whole face lit up and her eyes would twinkle. Her eyes were not twinkling tonight and his heart lurched in his chest.

They carried on getting louder until Neil decided it was time to head out before they got themselves in trouble.

When the time came for them to leave the bar and head home, they were going to have to walk right by Audrey and Kashal. He assumed that the other guys didn't know that she was married and didn't want to make her feel awkward. Her didn't want to put her in that position.

He steered them towards the door in an around about sort of way to give them a wide berth and as he was about to follow them out the door, he looked up to see that she was sat alone. He fought against every fibre of his being in that moment, he wanted to go over to her but he just sighed and walked out of the door.

He got out onto the sidewalk to finding Kevin and Delun waiting for him. They were having a drunken heart to heart and didn't see him approach. He heard his name mentioned and coughed as he approached to warn them. He wasn't in the mood for fun anymore tonight.

After dropping the guys home and making sure Delun got in safely he headed home himself. Before turning off the ignition, he sat a while in his car outside. His cell in his hand, he was experiencing a conflict. He wanted to text and check in with Audrey, but after a few minutes he decided that he would wait and speak to her in person.

About what, he wasn't exactly sure. Maybe to tell her he had feelings for her, maybe he'd chicken out and would just tell them about the boys night out. He certainly wasn't one to look to break up a marriage but if what Joanne had told him was true, maybe she just needed to know someone was there if she needed to make the tough decisions.

Next shift, he and Audrey needed to talk.


	7. Chapter 7

The surgeries came thick and fast over the next few weeks. The residents were truly being tested to their limits and they were becoming increasingly aware that two of them would not be around next year.

Because of this, they found their time to socialise severely restricted and they saw less and less of each other. Neil tried to pin Audrey down to talk more than once but the opportunity wasn't forthcoming and just like that, the moment had passed.

They had all begun a series of meetings with Dr. Glassman to go over their patient reviews and assessments. The medical stuff had become a blur of complications, good and bad outcomes and some truly crazy events.

The most crazy of all was a poor theatre nurse passing out face first towards the surgical site. The reflexes of the nearest resident made them put out their hand which resulted in her falling backwards, cracking her head on the hard floor and starting to bleed. There was just total silence for a few seconds where nobody knew quite what to do until the attending started barking orders. The poor lady was scooped up and Kevin was redirected from the OR to stitch her up.

Neil's latest meeting with Glassman had taken a slightly different turn. It started with some inane small talk but then quickly turned to assessing his fellow residents. Neil was sure that Glassman seemed to be focusing on Chen, asking about his relationship with the other residents, what he thought his strengths and weaknesses were.

After a minute or so, Neil came to the awful realization he wasn't just asking out of interest. He was gathering ammunition to terminate him at the end of the year and suddenly Neil was horrified to realise he was even remotely involved.

It dawned on him while he was sitting there that someone he liked, his friend, who had spent most his adult life struggling in undergrad, medical school, and the lab, who had what he suspected was a six figure debt, was about to get their career destroyed.

Neil was due to head home after his meeting had finished and wanted to get out of the hospital as quickly as possible. He kept his head down and almost jogged to the locker room. As he turned the corner, he quite literally ran into Audrey. He bumbled an apology and burst through the door into the safety of the men's locker room.

Or so he thought. A few seconds later came a gentle knock as she pushed the door open.

"Are you decent?" she called, entering into the room more fully.

"Yeah, just grabbing my stuff and going" he replied.

"Do you want to tell me what's wrong before you do?"

He looked at her. He felt guilty but he couldn't bring himself to tell her what he had just done.

"I'll be fine, thanks" he replied. "I'm going to go run it off" he said with a shallow smile. "See you in a couple of days."

"Sure," she replied, moving to let him pass. She watched him walk away thinking that there was definitely something wrong.

Next shift, she and Neil need to talk.

X

She remembers quite clearly the first time she saw him outside of work without the other residents.

She was walking in Penitencia Creek Park with Kashal that evening. They were going out for dinner and he thought a good walk would help them build up an appetite.

The park was busy, with lots of families using the wide open green spaces. They walked along, side by side in the early evening sunshine. Kashal was telling her about a new case that had crossed his desk that morning and how it could be the start of big things for him. She was listening when he began talking, but her interest waned and she felt herself looking off into the distance.

She saw him as soon as he came over the top of the small rise. He was thundering along at a quick pace and would be passing them very soon.

Her heart leapt, and a slight panic accompanied the feeling. Would he stop? Would he want to meet Kashal?

As he got closer, she could make out some more detail. He had headphones on, blocking out any background noise and was likely listening to something with a good beat to keep that pace going.

She was wearing sunglasses which allowed her to spend time watching him as he got closer. He was dressed in shorts and a vest which allowed her to notice his physique. His legs were toned but his arms were something else. She briefly imagined those arms around her, then shook her head to dispel the image before Kashal noticed her daydreaming.

They were about to pass and he showed no signs of slowing down. When he was within a couple of steps, he raised his hand to greet her, shouted 'hi' as he thundered past. She lamely raised her hand in response and returned the greeting. She found herself relieved that he hadn't stopped.

"Who was that?" Kashal asked.

"Just a guy from work" she replied. "One of the other residents."

"In your year?" he asked.

"Yeah, one of my intake. He..."

"Anyway..." he carried on as he headed back to his tale. It seemed that his brief interest in her life was over.

X

Neil ran on and got back to his car in record time, it seemed that he'd had a lot of stresses to work off. Despite being totally out of breath, he was feeling refreshed and changed his shirt quickly in the parking lot before heading home to shower.

As he drove, his thoughts turned to Audrey again. Would she be pissed that he hadn't stopped to say hi? After hearing what Jo had to say, he wasn't quite sure how to behave around her right now.

By the time he arrived at his apartment, he had made his decision. He was going to be a grown up about it all. He'd speak with Audrey, explain his behaviour at the park and let her know that he would be there if she needed him.

That's all he could do for now and hope that was enough for them both.


	8. Chapter 8

They saw each other in passing over the next few shifts they worked together. They smiled and chatted but there was no time to sit and talk the way they wanted too. Both of them were pushing as hard as they could to make sure they weren't in that last elimination spot in a month's time and that left little time for anything else.

He eventually saw his chance and thought about approaching her as she was halfway through her lunch in the cafeteria. He wasn't sure she'd even talk about her personal life if there was a chance anyone could overhear, but it was now or never.

She had seen him looking over, trying to decide whether he should go sit with her so she gave a smile and raised her hand to show that she had seen him. His grinned in return, his whole face lighting up. This guy wore his emotions on his sleeve, it could take a while to get used to this she thought to herself.

"Do you mind if I sit?" he asked.

"Would I have waved if I minded" she smiled.

"True" he replied as he put down his tray and took a moment to settle himself. "Can we talk?" he asked.

She raised her eyebrows and looked around. He took the hint and took it slowly.

"So, enjoy your walk the other night?"

"Was a lovely evening for a walk" was the uncommitted reply.

"Sorry I didn't stop" he continued. "I had some stresses I needed to get rid of." He paused "And I wasn't sure that it'd be ok with Kashal?"

She looked at her plate for a moment while she figured out what she wanted to say.

"He's a good man really" she started. "We're just so unsuited in almost everything, he doesn't really know how act in a relationship. He thinks he's head of the house and stuff like that, you know? He's never laid a hand on me in any way, but he likes to know where I am and who I'm with which is hard work. "

Neil just sat and listened. He didn't want to interrupt her now she seemed to be opening up but the pause went on.

"Would he have been ok if I had stopped?" he asked.

"Probably fine, I doubt that he'd be upset or jealous. It's honestly at the point that he just doesn't care anymore. Neither of us have the guts to call it quits though" she said with a sigh.

"So we can be friends, that'd be ok?" he asked cautiously.

"Sure, friends is good" she replied while keeping her actual thoughts quiet.

He gave a sympathetic smile, still not sure about what to say. He didn't like to hear her talk like this but was glad that she felt she could share with him.

Suddenly, she gave a wicked smile. "So, what about you and Ms. Jessica Preston? Have you heard from her?"

He cringed at the question but of they were going to be friends, this sharing thing needed to be a two way street.

"Yeah, she's coming back into town in a few weeks for the summer" he replied trying to gauge her response.

"And..." she pushed.

He smiled and shook his head. "And she's asked if I'm around" he said.

"Aaahhh, a summer break booty call" she teased and laughed out loud at the shocked look on his face.

"Erm," he started. "I, um..."

She laughed again but soon after she had a more serious look about her. She leaned in a little closer so he sat up and did the same.

"I know we had that moment" she said in a hushed tone. "But nothing can happen. I know my marriage isn't perfect but I'm not the type to have an affair."

"Aud, I'd never" he said a little louder than he expected. "What kind of guy do you think I am?" Some people from nearer tables turned to look and Audrey shook her head. He sounded genuinely offended.

"Sorry, that's not what I meant" she said lowering the volume of the conversation again. "You know, in a different time and place I bet we'd be awesome together" she continued.

"I think so" he smiled back.

"Besides, you're still competing with me for a spot for next year. It wouldn't work out!"

"Hey, I don't think so" he exclaimed. "Competition goes both ways" he laughed.

"Bet you a dollar we're both good" she smiled.

"Deal" he said putting his hand out to shake on it. She grasped it and shook, and it felt to both of them that whatever this relationship was going to be, they were in for the long run.

X

The dynamic of the group had changed so much during their this first year. They had been thrown together as strangers almost 12 months ago and now they sat together as friends.

Despite his original protestations, Dr. Glassman had eventually agreed that when he gave the results for the year, they would receive the news as a group.

This was not the usual process but they petitioned him relentlessly saying that they wanted to be there for each other. At the back of their minds, they had all come to terms with the fact that Chen was not going to be around next year, even Chen himself. The other elimination spot was still anyone's to fill.

Dr Glassman stood at the head of the table, just like he did almost 12 months ago. He took a deep breath and began to speak.

"Let's get down to business" he started. "After today, as mentioned in your induction, there will be four of you moving into next year. The decisions have been made based on the assessments we've made throughout the year.

"I'm out" blurted Chen.

They all looked at him in awe and he just shrugged.

"Just trying to ease the tension" he smiled sadly. "Wouldn't take a genius to figure it out."

"Thank you, Dr. Chen, for your input and I am afraid you are correct. Your knowledge is phenomenal, I just think that maybe surgery isn't for you" Dr. Glassman finished.

"And secondly, one of our team has decided to make the move up the coast to Virginia Mason Medical Center in Seattle. Congratulations Dr. Perry. You will make a valuable addition to their team."

The four remaining residents breathed a collective sigh of relief. They stood and spent time consoling and congratulating each other as Dr. Glassman looked on. He sat at the head of the table watching then interact, thinking that these particular residents had a bright future at St. Bonaventure and he was looking forward to being a part of it.


	9. Chapter 9

"Did we look that young and scared twelve months ago?" Kevin asked, laughing. They were leaning against the nurses station watching Dr Glassman show the new first year residents around. All of them were feeling old and tired after an intense year and the first years were all looking fresh and eager to get going.

"I guess we did" replied Audrey. "But look at us now! Lean, mean, surgical machines" she said smiling at the little group.

"I feel like I've aged ten years" Jo snorted. "They've got no idea what's coming, poor guys."

"As long as they stick together like we did, they'll be fine" Neil said earning himself some wrinkled noses in response.

They stood a moment longer, watching until the sound of Kevins page got their attention and they carried on about their business.

In the last month they had said goodbye to two of their friends. Delun had agreed that surgery wasn't for him and was going to redirect his focus on general practice. He had the medical knowledge, of that there was no doubt. It was just the high pressure situations which didn't suit him.

Alex was heading up to Seattle the week after the meeting so they'd had the chance for one last night out together before going and it was very bittersweet. They splashed out on a nice dinner for a change and were sat at a fairly upscale restaurant.

As usual, during dinner, the conversations turned some of their more interesting cases but due to the new surroundings, they talked in more hushed tones. They weren't the kind of conversations that the other diners would want to hear.

Once they paid the check, they headed out to the nearest bar. They walked along in a little group, the boys laughed as Jo linked arms with Audrey and dragged her along ahead to have a chat.

"So where does Kash think you are tonight? Late night study group? Emergency surgery?" she teased.

"Neither" Audrey replied with a smile. "I told him we were all going out because a couple of us were leaving."

"Aaaannndddd..."

"He was fine about it, wasn't bothered at all. I even said I might share a ride home and he was fine. Was very odd" she laughed.

"Wasn't expecting that" Jo replied.

"Neither was I" she replied. "But I'm certainly not going to complain."

"And you and Neil are acting differently I've noticed. A little less tension there maybe? " Jo continued, fuelled by the wine she'd had with dinner. "What's happened" she asked wiggling her eyebrows.

"Get your mind out of the gutter woman!" Audrey exclaimed. "We had a good talk, figured that it'd never work out and he's actually meeting up with Jessica in a couple of weeks."

"Ok, didn't see that coming" Jo replied sounding a little disappointed. "I figured you'd run off together and have beautiful, clever little babies!"

"We'll make good friends. We're total opposites, it'd never work as anything else" Audrey replied as they approached the entrance to the bar.

"Who exactly are you trying to persuade here Aud?" Jo teased as she turned and walked into the noise of the bar before she could answer.

X

They settled into their roles as second year residents quite easily over the next few weeks. The extra responsibilities that came with the role were embraced and they particularly enjoyed giving all the menial tasks to the new first years.

Jo and Kevin were still as thick as thieves and were beginning to become the topic of some hospital gossip. They took no notice and brushed it off, neither of them were bothered by it and they were happy that nobody actually knew the truth behind the relationship.

Audrey's newfound honesty with Kashal led to her being a little less surly. She seemed to be enjoying her new found freedom and was found by Jo studying some motorcycle brochures into get bag at the end of a shift which was a hot topic for the next few shifts.

Neil had been seeing Jessica quite regularly over the last few weeks. Audrey asked after her now and again to be polite, but was regularly berated afterwards by the others. They protested that they didn't want to know about the little rich girl who was using Neil for his obvious attributes and she rolled her eyes.

X

She remembers quite clearly she saw Neil and Jessica as a couple for the first time. Afterwards, she would reflect that she was glad she wasn't alone.

They were walking along in the sunshine in Hellyer Park. There were cyclists and joggers everywhere but one particular blonde head caught her eye. She must have left out an audible groan because she caught her walking buddy's attention.

"What's up?" Jo asked innocently.

"Can we walk a different way?"

"Why? This goes up along the creek and we get into some shade soon" Jo countered. "I need some shade."

Sat up on a wall up ahead, she had noticed Jessica. She just seemed to be sitting, enjoying the sunshine but Audrey figured differently. From what she had deduced from her awkward chats with Neil, this wasn't the type of place that Jessica would normally hang out.

"Jessica" Audrey said flatly nodding ahead. "Neil will be around here somewhere" she added trying not to sound as if it were a problem.

"Not necessarily" Jo replied.

Before either of them could say anything else, they saw him. He was running along the trail they were about to take and if they carried on, they would walk right into him. Instead, they stopped a while casually looking at a noticeboard, hoping that the couple would move on.

They watched as Neil approached and Jessicas face broke into a wide smile. He slowed as he got closer and when he was near enough, he nudged her knees apart to stand between them trapping her up on the wall.

She seemed to push him away in the first instance, but he refused to move and stood fast, laughing. He took a bottle of water she offered, took a few gulps and poured the last of it over his head. He looked up at her smiling and put his hands on her thighs while he moved closer and kissed her.

Jessica took his face in her hands and kissed him back. Audrey turned to Jo who read her face like an open book.

"Let's go Aud" she said, taking her friends hand and heading back to their parked car. "Let's ditch the sneakers and go for brunch. We both need a couple of mimosas after that" she smiled sadly.


	10. Chapter 10

She actively avoided him for the next couple of weeks while Jessica was in town. She developed a sixth sense for him and would always have an excuse on hand to leave the room if he appeared. She was a little disappointed in herself that she was feeling this way and figured that avoiding him would take away some of the sting.

Unfortunately, her actions did not go unnoticed by the other residents and even some of the first years commented on her peculiar behaviour. They had deduced that Audrey plainly didn't like Neil and she didn't discourage that sentiment among them. It was better than the alternative, gossip generating option.

Eventually, her luck ran out and he cornered her as she was leaving the ladies locker room at the end of her shift. Bag and jacket in hand, she tried to make her excuses but he was having none of it.

"What's going on Aud?" he asked her, following her to the elevator.

She pressed the button, willing it to hurry up so she could excuse herself.

"Nothing is wrong, I'm just running late" she replied in a non committal tone.

"That's not it" he replied. "The is more to it than that."

"I can't do this right now" she said as the doors pinged open. She breathed a sign of relief and got in, only for him to follow her, not happy with her evasive answer.

"Yes, we do this right now please. I'm hearing rumours about myself from the nursing staff that we've fallen out and it's not okay."

"Fine" she sighed. There was nobody in the elevator car with them so she blurted "I saw you and Jessica in Hellyer Park a couple of weeks ago. I avoided you guys on purpose. I felt...I don't know how I felt but I didn't like it. Sorry, I know I've got no right to..."

"It's ok, I get it" he said softly. He was about to continue but they had just arrived on the ground floor and he didn't want to cause a scene as the elevator doors opened.

"How can we fix this? We could be great friends if we could work this out. I know we could" Neil continued as they walked towards the front doors.

"I don't know, give it some time. We'll figure it out I'm sure" she replied with a small smile. "Best stop this conversation here though, Kash is driving me today, he'll be outside already."

"Can I meet him?" Neil asked unexpectedly. "Fairs fair, you know Jessica" he shrugged when she looked at him quite confused.

"I suppose" she replied. "Lets keep the chatter work based though, okay. I don't want the third degree on the car ride home."

"Sure" Neil smiled as they exited the main doors. Kashal was waiting leaning up against the hood of his car. He stood as they approached and the first thing Neil noticed was that he was a good head in height above him. He was dressed in a sharp suit, shiny shoes and had a well maintained beard.

He gave a small smile as Audrey approached but did not stop to kiss her. He just held out his hand and Neil shook it firmly.

"Nice to meet you Kashal" he started. "We were just comparing some notes on the way out, Audrey is quite the font of knowledge" he said with a smile.

"Nice to meet you too, Dr..."

"Melendez" Audrey jumped in. "This is Dr Melendez, one of my fellow second year residents."

"Neil" he confirmed. "Any plans for the weekend?" he asked politely.

"I've got a lot of work on" Kashal said. "But Audrey is off to see a movie tomorrow night. Some comic book thing as usual."

Neil looked with raised eyebrows.

"The new Transformers movie is out. Haven't had a chance to go yet" she confirmed.

"Nice, enjoy" Neil said smiling.

Kashal let out a laugh. Neil noticed that Audrey just closed her eyes as if she was hoping the ground would open and swallow her up.

"She's going by herself" he laughed. "Her friends aren't interested in that sort of stuff. "

"I'm sure you'll enjoy, movies aren't really for socialising anyway, are they? Can't talk in the dark, can you" Neil laughed, looking at Audrey who have a small smile.

"Well, it was nice to meet you" Kashal said effectively ending the conversation.

"You too," Neil replied. "Enjoy the movie" he said to Audrey. "See you in a couple of days."

They said their farewells, Audrey opened her door and got in while Kash walked around. Neil turned and headed back inside before they pulled away from the kerb. As much as he wanted to, he did not turn and look back.

X

Something was bothering him, it niggled at him for the rest of his shift. He saw some interesting patients, but nothing could quite distract him from the feeling he had after his meeting with Kashal.

By the time his shift finished the next afternoon, he thought he had figured it out so he showered and changed as quickly as he could once he was free to go. He grabbed a quick takeout from the diner just by the hospital and headed out to complete a task which he hoped would put his mind at rest.

He pulled into a parking lot and shoved his dinner down his throat before he went inside. They had learned in the early days of their residency how to eat fast without suffering the after effects and he smiled at himself.

He went inside, got himself a soda and sat down to wait. He watched crowds come and go but did not see what he came to see.

He waited... for over an hour, almost two.

Eventually, he saw her. She arrived at the movie theatre about five minutes before the feature was due to start. He had a brief moment of panic when he thought he might look like a stalker but figured it would now be a thousand times worse if she caught him leaving.

She joined the back of the short line to buy a ticket and he decided that now was the time.  
He joined the queue behind her and casually asked "Fancy sitting together?"

Her head spun like a top to look at him and the initial reaction of shock faded into a confused smile.

"Sure, that would be nice" she replied. "Although, I'm not here to socialise, you know?" she smiled referring back to their conversation from the day before.

They purchased their tickets along with one or two items from the concession stand and went inside to claim their seats. The theatre was not crowded so they had their pick and sat in comfortable silence until the feature started.

The movie began with a bang. Neil glanced over at Audrey a few times and decided that the look on her face was one he'd quite happily look at again and again. She was totally enthralled by the action on screen and sat with a small smile on her face the entire time.

Over an hour in, Audrey looked over and saw Neil with his head back on the seat and his eyes closed. She stifled a laugh as she realised he had fallen asleep. He had just finished an extremely long shift at the hospital and she didn't have the heart to nudge him awake.

She pretended not to notice when the movie finale got louder and louder and he startled awake but just smiled quietly to herself.

"Did you enjoy that?" Audrey asked as they walked back towards the foyer.

"Erm, bits of it" Neil replied. "I've not seen the first one so not sure what was going on to be honest" he smiled as he held her jacket for her to put her arms in.

As they walked to the car, Audrey tried to compose the words to a question she needed answering.

As they got to her car, Neil leaned past and opened her door for her to get inside. She turned to face him.

"Why did you come tonight?" she asked looking confused.

He leaned on his forearm along the top of her door, his fingers stopping just millimetres from hers and took a deep breath in.

"I just thought you might want some company" he replied. "It's what friends do right?"

"But how did you know what theatre? What viewing to come to?"

He looked down at his feet and mumbled something she couldn't catch.

"Pardon?" she pushed, "I didn't get that."

He looked up, right into her eyes. "I didn't know, I guessed. I waited over an hour and would have waited until the last showing if I had too" he said quickly. "Sorry if that's weird" he said looking back to his feet.

"It's a little weird" she agreed. "But it's also the nicest thing anyone has done for me for a long time. Thank you." she smiled.

They just stood a moment, looking at each other with goofy little smiles on their faces until a nearby car store slamming made them jump.

"I'd best be heading back..." Audrey started.

"Sure," Neil replied, stepping back for her to close her door. "See you in a day or so."

He stood and watched as she pulled away before heading to his own car on the other side of the lot. Anyone walking past would have thought he was coming away from a successful first date, looking at the little smile on his face.

He got into his car, leaned back against the headrest and sighed. He had enjoyed the parts of the film he saw and had definitely enjoyed seeing Audrey. Maybe he could suggest this as a 'thing' when the moment presented itself.

X

He was back at St Bonaventure about 36 hours later to start his next shift. Dropping his bag on the bench in the locker room, he went to put the combination on his locker when he saw the door slightly ajar. He didn't keep valuables in there while he was away from there hospital so just figured he hadn't closed it properly last time he left.

He threw his bag into the bottom and as he went to hang up his jacket, he noticed a packet on the top shelf. Frowning to himself, he gently took it down and peered inside. His face broke into a large smile as he picked out a DVD copy of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.

There was no note or tag on it, but there was no doubt who had put it there. This friends thing was going to work out after all.


	11. Chapter 11

A few short weeks later, three of them sat together in the corner of the hospital cafeteria eating lunch. They had saved a fourth seat and could see Audrey finishing up at the cashier's desk and turning to look for them. Kevin raised his hand, she smiled and headed towards them.

As she unloaded her tray onto the table, Neil's hand snuck out and snagged the small side bowl of salad that she'd been given. Without missing a beat, she took the untouched bowl of potato chips from in front of him and poured them onto her plate. Kevin and Jo didn't say a word but exchanged a knowing smile.

They didn't get to do this so much anymore so grabbed every opportunity they could. The topic of conversation was usually interesting cases and a smattering of their private lives but this time it had turned to the upcoming annual gala. There were two days to go and by tomorrow, the corner they were currently sat in would have been spruced up ready to entertain the big hospital donors.

Jo was finding it entertaining watching the new first years fret over getting ready while working their shifts. She was a lot more blasé about it this year and considered herself very well prepared.

"So will we be graced with Ms. Prestons company at the gala this year?" Kevin asked earning himself a dig under the table from Jo.

"Not that I know of" Neil replied casually causing Jo to look confused. He caught this fleeting look and continued to speak.

"She's been busy with exams, we've not spoken for a couple of weeks."

"So you guys aren't serious?" Jo asked trying to casually fish for more information. "I thought it was exclusive?"

"As serious as it can be for people living on opposite coasts. We catch up when we can and we're free to see other people."

"But you don't?" Kevin pointed out, which earned him a sigh from Neil.

"Like I have the time" he said. "This place is a vacuum for any kind of social life!"

Just like that, their pagers started going, one after the other. Lunchtime was over.

X

A mass casualty event was incoming and the calls had gone out that whatever you were doing, it was to be dropped like a hot rock. It was going to be all hands on deck.

They were stood away the entrance to the Emergency Room with gloves and gowns on ready. The attending in charge gave a run down of tag identifications and after a few minutes, they could see the blue lights incoming. Their biggest test yet was about to begin.

The patients arrived thick and fast and they were sent off one by one to diagnose and treat. There had been an incident downtown, where an individual had opened fire in a restaurant from which he had recently been terminated. The results were widespread, there were confirmed fatalities at the scene, and those gurneys would be taken directly to the morgue.

First year residents were given walking wounded. People had tried to escape and hide during the panic which resulted in falls and other minor injuries. One of the attendings had taken a police officer who had been shot by the perpetrator. He was in a serious condition on arrival and was taken straight to a cubicle.

Audrey was next in line for a patient and the individual that followed had suffered flesh wounds from an altercation. However, this patient was handcuffed to his gurney. It was the shooter.

She went straight into action, ensuring he was stable and diagnosing his injuries as non urgent. She tagged him as yellow and set about cleaning up some of the more superficial wounds.

She heard an urgent call from the cubicle further along that more hands were needed. She finished up the line of sutures she was working on and told the police officers she'd be back as soon as she could.

The police officer from earlier was in worse condition than they originally thought. Audrey was told to get her hands in and apply pressure on the thigh. The officer was bleeding out and voices were being raised as they tried frantically to save him.

She felt like she was literally up to her elbows when she heard another commotion starting. She could hear people calling for her and as they pulled the curtain back, she could see people running to attend to her yellow tagged patient. Judging by the level of activity around him, he had quickly turned into a red.

She was torn. If she removed her hand, this police officer would bleed out. If she stayed, the perpetrator could die. The attending directing the treatment barked at her forcing her to refocus as they took the patient directly into surgery. She was gone for hours.

X

The entire team was exhausted once the last of the patients were processed and treated. One by one as they finished their paperwork, many of them headed off to the Residents Room to try and catch some sleep before their next shift started. There was no point in going home to return to the hospital so soon afterwards.

Neil opened the door quietly to the dimly lit room to check if there was any space left. One of Kevin's long legs was hanging down from a top bunk with a first year intern fast asleep in the one below. The other top bunk was occupied by one of the attendings and Jo was tucked in under a blanket on the sofa. This left the other bottom bunk free so he kicked off his shoes and lay down. It didn't take long for sleep to take him, they were all exhausted.

An hour or so later, Audrey was looking for somewhere to lie her head. He heard the door handle click and opened his eyes. He saw her step gingerly inside, careful not to wake anyone. She had a quick look around and found all the bunks occupied still. As she passed the bunk by the door to leave she felt a hand grab hers and stifled a scream as she jumped out of her skin.

She looked down with a frown and saw Neil looking up at her. He moved over until his back was against the wall and parted the space he had made next to him. She raised her eyebrows at him and he smirked.

"I'm a grown man, I promise to keep my hands to myself" he whispered, smiling.

"You'd better" she smiled as she kicked off her shoes and lay down. It didn't take long for sleep to take them both.

Jo was woken a short while later by her pager buzzing next to her head. She grabbed it and shut it off before it woke anyone else. She sat up, folded the blanket she had used and slipped on her shoes. All the bunks were still occupied but by different people from when she put her head down.

She glanced around to check who was who but stopped by the bottom bunk nearest the door. She looked and smiled, despite her heart breaking a little inside.

Lying on her side was Audrey, one arm tucked under her head as a pillow and the other tucked in close to her chest. Behind her, on the same bunk was Neil. His position mirrored hers except his free arm had wrapped around her, holding her close.

She took out her cell and quickly snapped a picture before heading out to attend her call. That picture would go along with the other photograph she had stashed away. She was sure they'd be useful some day.

X

Neil woke naturally a short while later, inadvertently pulling Audrey closer to him as he did so, forgetting exactly where he was. This caused her to wake also, stretching slowly and shuffling into her back.

"Sorry" Neil started. "I didn't mean..."

"It's fine" she smiled. "Was pretty comfortable actually."

After a few seconds she spoke again.

"The perp died last night."

"I know" he replied, propping himself up on his elbow. "The officer survived though."

"It was my fault" she said sadly. "It looks like I chose the 'good guy' over the 'bad guy' which isn't ok."

"If that's what actually happened, then no, it wouldn't be ok" Neil countered. "But would you make the same choice again? Would you stay with the officer if we did it all again?" he asked

She nodded.

"You can't regret the decisions you make Aud, they'll often be life and death. You have to make best decision with the info you have. The officer would have died if you had moved your hand, yes?"

"Yes" she replied.

"And the other guy, what was wrong with him?"

"I don't know, I must have missed something."

"I doubt that very much Dr Lim" he smiled. "You didn't know he was going to die. All you knew is that your other patient definitely would. You didn't make the right choice, the was no choice to make."

Neil lay back down and they stayed that way, in silence for a few moments until Jo stuck her head around the door.

"Wakey, wakey sleepy heads!"

They laughed at their friend, and sat up to slip their shoes back on. Jo held the door as Audrey passed by but put her hand out to slow Neil's exit.

"What's up?" Neil asked her, looking confused.

"Jessica is here, she came to surprise you" she replied in a serious tone. "She's overheard a bit of gossip from the nurses station that you and Aud were cuddled up together. You might want to do some damage control."

Neil's shoulders slumped. "Thanks for the heads up" he said as he headed out into the hospital to find her.


	12. Chapter 12

He found her eventually. He had been keeping an eye out as he moved around the hospital but patients came first and ultimately, his attention was redirected. He was passing by Glassman's office to head to the conference room for a pre-op meeting when he saw her. She was sat opposite Dr. Glassman and they were discussing something quite animatedly.

He walked on by, took his seat and waited for the meeting to begin. The attending in charge ran through what was expected of each of them during the procedure the next day and sent them away to complete the final bits of research and reading they might need.

They were dismissed after about an hour and there she was, waiting in the hall. He smiled cautiously and went over to say hi. He decided against kissing her on the cheek as a greeting but stood close enough that they could share a soft touch discreetly if the conversation went that way.

They stood, leaning against the wall, looking at each other. Both of them wanting the other to start talking first.

"What are you doing here Jessica?" Neil finally asked, breaking the stalemate.

"I just came by to see Aaron, I like to check in on him in person now and again" she replied flatly. "And thought I'd surprise you and we could catch up too, but apparently you were busy" she said sarcastically.

"Really? Why are you pissed at me exactly? " he asked, frowning.

"Dr Lim" she said abruptly.

"What about her?"

"What's going on with you two?" she quizzed him.

"Nothing! She's a friend and a colleague, that's all" he replied, shaking his head in disbelief.

"Nothing more?" she pushed.

"No, nothing more" he replied incredulously. "Besides, she's married. I'm not that kind of guy, haven't you realised that by now?" he said, getting frustrated at being questioned.

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry" she said trying to contain the volume of the conversation. "I guess I didn't like hearing gossip, that's all. I didn't like the thought of you with somebody else" she sighed.

This did nothing to curtail his frustration. "And where exactly were you last week, after your exams had finished?" he countered. "Celebrating weren't you?"

"You know I was" she snapped.

"With who?" he pushed back.

She did not reply, she just slumped slightly against the wall. He didn't enjoy seeing her looking defeated but he couldn't seem to let go.

"So, it's one rule for you, and another for me then?" he said questioningly. "You can do whatever you like, and I have to wait around for you to show up and show me a good time when you feel like it? Hardly an equal relationship is it? Hardly a relationship at all really, don't you think?"

The look on her face shocked him. He had shocked himself with the amount of venom behind the last few words.

"I'm sorry" he said quietly. "That was too much."

"But you're right" she said holding back the tears that were filling her eyes. "It's not fair" she agreed.

As if being saved by the bell, Neil's pager began to sound signalling the end of the conversation. He turned to leave but she reached out to touch his arm.

"Can we talk more later?" she asked with a hopeful look on her face.

"Sure, I'll call you later" he replied before heading for the stairwell.

X

He spent the rest of his shift focused on his patients. He swung by the lobby to get himself a coffee and stood a moment in the relative peace watching the final preparations for tomorrow's Gala. He took a long draw of the hot, vanilla flavoured liquid and closed his eyes to savour the flavour.

Seconds later, he was startled out of his reverie by someone clapping his shoulders. He spilled some of his coffee down his shirt and turned to scold the culprit. He quickly changed his mind when he saw Kevin's cheerful face.

"So are you in trouble?" Kevin asked, giving him a nudge.

"Trouble? For what?" Neil replied.

"With Ms. Preston, of course" he teased.

"Ah, that" Neil said with a wry smile. "She's pissed because I shared a bunk with someone who needed to sleep, while she gets to go on vacation with her law school mates and do whatever she likes" he said snapped.

"Woah, I was kidding, take it easy" Kevin said defensively.

"Sorry" he sighed. "I've already been questioned this morning and she wants to talk more later. I'm not sure I'm ready for what she wants" he said shaking his head.

"You think she's going to want to make things more serious?"

"Right now, I'm hoping not, but I'm thinking she does. I didn't realise anything had changed. I could have been dating other people, just like she was, I just haven't had time" he said sounding exasperated.

"You know I don't think she'd be feeling like this if it was anyone else. I think it's because it's Audrey."

"Don't be so dumb" Neil replied.

"Everyone else can see it Neil. It's so obvious you two have 'a thing', you can't deny it" Kevin said smiling softly.

Neil went to defend himself further but Kevin held up his hand to signal he wasn't finished.

"You can't tell me that if she wasn't married and you weren't such a goody-two-shoes that nothing would have happened?"

Neil just smiled and replied "Maybe. But the point is, it hasn't."

"Yeah, you keep telling yourself that mate" Kevin laughed as he clapped his shoulder once more before heading back to his patients.

Neil stood a moment longer, just thinking. He and Jessica definitely needed to talk.

X

They met up at an upscale bar that evening to continue their conversation from earlier. Neil sipped at a bourbon, it would be his one and only drink as he had an early start the next morning. Jessica nursed a large glass of wine, she felt she needed the Dutch courage.

"So are you planning on coming tomorrow night" Neil asked trying to kick start the conversation.

"That depends on how this chat goes really" she replied.

"I'm not really sure what else we need to discuss, we seem to be on different pages here."

"We weren't, until I realised I didn't like the idea of sharing you with anyone else" she said, taking another sip.

"Anyone else? Or Audrey?" Neil asked feeling brave.

A look of shocked passed across her face for the second time today as a result of his honesty.

"Audrey, I suppose" she replied meekly.

Neil gave a wry smile, turns out Kevin was right.

"Why are you smiling?" Jessica asked. "This isn't funny."

"I know, it's just..." he paused. "You're not the first person to tell me that today."

Jessica took a much larger drink from her glass and asked "So what now?"

"We could go back to the way we were before? Or we knock it on the head? I don't think we can do anything else, not with the physical distance and this obvious trust issue we're have going on."

She looked at him with tears brimming in her eyes. She had expected him to fight for more, to want to be in a more committed relationship. Yes, she had made a few little mistakes but didn't think that he'd call time on what they had. She had not seen this coming, people didn't normally turn down Jessica Preston.

She let out a breath she had been holding.

"Ok" she said quietly.

"You're great Jessica, you really are and I care a lot about you. Maybe if we were on the same coast it'd work out but for now, this isn't good for either of us."

"I understand" she said, not daring to say anymore in case the tears she was holding escaped.

"Will you be going tomorrow night?" he asked finishing the last of his drink.

"I don't think that's a good idea" she replied sadly. "Maybe next year."

"Sure" he said. "I'm really sorry, I have to get going, we've got a big op in the morning so I need to get some sleep. Do you need a ride?" he asked.

She shook her head.

"Will you be ok?" he asked.

"Yeah," she said sadly. "I'll call some of the girls to come and help me drown my sorrows."

"Sure. Bye Jessica, I am sorry" he said as he turned to walk away.

"Me too" she whispered as she watched him leave.


	13. Chapter 13

He found her eventually. He had been keeping an eye out as he moved around the hospital but patients came first and ultimately, his attention was redirected. He was passing by Glassman's office to head to the conference room for a pre-op meeting when he saw her. She was sat opposite Dr. Glassman and they were discussing something quite animatedly.

He walked on by, took his seat and waited for the meeting to begin. The attending in charge ran through what was expected of each of them during the procedure the next day and sent them away to complete the final bits of research and reading they might need.

They were dismissed after about an hour and there she was, waiting in the hall. He smiled cautiously and went over to say hi. He decided against kissing her on the cheek as a greeting but stood close enough that they could share a soft touch discreetly if the conversation went that way.

They stood, leaning against the wall, looking at each other. Both of them wanting the other to start talking first.

"What are you doing here Jessica?" Neil finally asked, breaking the stalemate.

"I just came by to see Aaron, I like to check in on him in person now and again" she replied flatly. "And thought I'd surprise you and we could catch up too, but apparently you were busy" she said sarcastically.

"Really? Why are you pissed at me exactly? " he asked, frowning.

"Dr Lim" she said abruptly.

"What about her?"

"What's going on with you two?" she quizzed him.

"Nothing! She's a friend and a colleague, that's all" he replied, shaking his head in disbelief.

"Nothing more?" she pushed.

"No, nothing more" he replied incredulously. "Besides, she's married. I'm not that kind of guy, haven't you realised that by now?" he said, getting frustrated at being questioned.

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry" she said trying to contain the volume of the conversation. "I guess I didn't like hearing gossip, that's all. I didn't like the thought of you with somebody else" she sighed.

This did nothing to curtail his frustration. "And where exactly were you last week, after your exams had finished?" he countered. "Celebrating weren't you?"

"You know I was" she snapped.

"With who?" he pushed back.

She did not reply, she just slumped slightly against the wall. He didn't enjoy seeing her looking defeated but he couldn't seem to let go.

"So, it's one rule for you, and another for me then?" he said questioningly. "You can do whatever you like, and I have to wait around for you to show up and show me a good time when you feel like it? Hardly an equal relationship is it? Hardly a relationship at all really, don't you think?"

The look on her face shocked him. He had shocked himself with the amount of venom behind the last few words.

"I'm sorry" he said quietly. "That was too much."

"But you're right" she said holding back the tears that were filling her eyes. "It's not fair" she agreed.

As if being saved by the bell, Neil's pager began to sound signalling the end of the conversation. He turned to leave but she reached out to touch his arm.

"Can we talk more later?" she asked with a hopeful look on her face.

"Sure, I'll call you later" he replied before heading for the stairwell.

X

He spent the rest of his shift focused on his patients. He swung by the lobby to get himself a coffee and stood a moment in the relative peace watching the final preparations for tomorrow's Gala. He took a long draw of the hot, vanilla flavoured liquid and closed his eyes to savour the flavour.

Seconds later, he was startled out of his reverie by someone clapping his shoulders. He spilled some of his coffee down his shirt and turned to scold the culprit. He quickly changed his mind when he saw Kevin's cheerful face.

"So are you in trouble?" Kevin asked, giving him a nudge.

"Trouble? For what?" Neil replied.

"With Ms. Preston, of course" he teased.

"Ah, that" Neil said with a wry smile. "She's pissed because I shared a bunk with someone who needed to sleep, while she gets to go on vacation with her law school mates and do whatever she likes" he said snapped.

"Woah, I was kidding, take it easy" Kevin said defensively.

"Sorry" he sighed. "I've already been questioned this morning and she wants to talk more later. I'm not sure I'm ready for what she wants" he said shaking his head.

"You think she's going to want to make things more serious?"

"Right now, I'm hoping not, but I'm thinking she does. I didn't realise anything had changed. I could have been dating other people, just like she was, I just haven't had time" he said sounding exasperated.

"You know I don't think she'd be feeling like this if it was anyone else. I think it's because it's Audrey."

"Don't be so dumb" Neil replied.

"Everyone else can see it Neil. It's so obvious you two have 'a thing', you can't deny it" Kevin said smiling softly.

Neil went to defend himself further but Kevin held up his hand to signal he wasn't finished.

"You can't tell me that if she wasn't married and you weren't such a goody-two-shoes that nothing would have happened?"

Neil just smiled and replied "Maybe. But the point is, it hasn't."

"Yeah, you keep telling yourself that mate" Kevin laughed as he clapped his shoulder once more before heading back to his patients.

Neil stood a moment longer, just thinking. He and Jessica definitely needed to talk.

X

They met up at an upscale bar that evening to continue their conversation from earlier. Neil sipped at a bourbon, it would be his one and only drink as he had an early start the next morning. Jessica nursed a large glass of wine, she felt she needed the Dutch courage.

"So are you planning on coming tomorrow night" Neil asked trying to kick start the conversation.

"That depends on how this chat goes really" she replied.

"I'm not really sure what else we need to discuss, we seem to be on different pages here."

"We weren't, until I realised I didn't like the idea of sharing you with anyone else" she said, taking another sip.

"Anyone else? Or Audrey?" Neil asked feeling brave.

A look of shocked passed across her face for the second time today as a result of his honesty.

"Audrey, I suppose" she replied meekly.

Neil gave a wry smile, turns out Kevin was right.

"Why are you smiling?" Jessica asked. "This isn't funny."

"I know, it's just..." he paused. "You're not the first person to tell me that today."

Jessica took a much larger drink from her glass and asked "So what now?"

"We could go back to the way we were before? Or we knock it on the head? I don't think we can do anything else, not with the physical distance and this obvious trust issue we're have going on."

She looked at him with tears brimming in her eyes. She had expected him to fight for more, to want to be in a more committed relationship. Yes, she had made a few little mistakes but didn't think that he'd call time on what they had. She had not seen this coming, people didn't normally turn down Jessica Preston.

She let out a breath she had been holding.

"Ok" she said quietly.

"You're great Jessica, you really are and I care a lot about you. Maybe if we were on the same coast it'd work out but for now, this isn't good for either of us."

"I understand" she said, not daring to say anymore in case the tears she was holding escaped.

"Will you be going tomorrow night?" he asked finishing the last of his drink.

"I don't think that's a good idea" she replied sadly. "Maybe next year."

"Sure" he said. "I'm really sorry, I have to get going, we've got a big op in the morning so I need to get some sleep. Do you need a ride?" he asked.

She shook her head.

"Will you be ok?" he asked.

"Yeah," she said sadly. "I'll call some of the girls to come and help me drown my sorrows."

"Sure. Bye Jessica, I am sorry" he said as he turned to walk away.

"Me too" she whispered as she watched him leave.


	14. Chapter 14

Fresh from a good nights sleep, Neil was scrubbing in ready for the scheduled surgery he was assisting on. The attending in charge was an experienced lady who was very keen to have her junior doctors get hands on experience. She was an excellent teacher and Neil had learned a lot so far.

The patient was wheeled in and the procedure began. All was going well and Neil had just positioned the catheters with the wires into the patient's heart. The next thing Neil was aware of, was the senior surgeon leaving the room while tearing off her surgical gown.

"Oh, no" was the last thing he heard as she ran out if the door.

Neil waited a while, watching the wires just hanging out there pulsating along with the heart beat. He had never made to this point in the procedure alone before so he stood there a moment longer, looking at the monitor's thinking 'crap, what do I do now?'

He was starting to worry a little. The attending had gotten food poisoning and made a run for the bathroom and would not return any time soon. The cardiothoracic fellow was taking a break and was not returning pages or calls so it was down to him.

Finally he looked to his theatre tech who had been assisting on procedures like these since before he was born. She gave Neil a nod and guided him to flush the catheters to prevent blood clots. And after a few more minutes they properly removed the catheters and wires and Neil closed up the surgical field.

Neil thanked everyone for their work and the patient was taken into recovery while the surgical team continued with their usual procedures. Neil hung back afterwards to speak to the theatre tech, he caught her coming out of the scrub room.

"I wanted to say thanks" he said smiling. "Your guidance was invaluable in there, I really appreciate it."

"Oh, you'd have got it done eventually" she smiled back. "The knowledge is in there Dr Melendez, you've just got to streamline it so it's easy to get to. You're one of the most arrogant residents we've ever had, but for once, you actually have the skills to back it up. Have more confidence in your abilities and you'll go along way here" she said before she turned to walk away.

X

News of his successful solo procedure travelled around the hospital and he found himself sitting in front of Dr Glassman that afternoon. He was just finishing up a call but invited him in to take his seat.

He was hoping that he didn't look as nervous as he felt and was making a conscious effort not to fidget or tap his feet. He eventually hung up the call and turned his attention to Neil.

"I've heard good things about you today Dr Melendez" he said. It was the kind of thing that you would expect to be said with a smile but his expression was neutral.

"Thank you, Dr Glassman." he replied nervously. "I couldn't have done it without the rest of the theatre staff though, especially the tech, Sue."

This caused Glassmans face to break into a wide smile. Neil raised his eyebrows.

"Well it's true!" he exclaimed with a laugh. "It would appear you really are the nice guy they say you are" he continued.

Neil immediately relaxed but stayed quiet.

"A bit of humility goes a long way around here Dr Melendez. I just wanted to say well done" Glassman reiterated. "That'll be all, I'll see you at the Gala this evening."

"Thank you Dr Glassman, see you this evening" Neil replied, rising from his seat.

"One more thing" he said stopping Neil in his tracks.

"Yes Sir" Neil replied turning back.

"I understand that you and Ms. Preston are no longer an item?"

Neil opened his mouth to answer but was met with a raised hand. "I wanted to assure you, that my personal relationship with Jessica will have no effect on our professional relationship, Dr Melendez" he continued.

"Sure, thank you" Neil replied again, feeling that he really could have said a bit more during this meeting. "See you this evening."

"Yes Dr Melendez, see you this evening if we are able with all the ladies queuing up to dance again" he laughed.

"Yes Sir" he laughed and headed back down to the wards.

X

The rest of the afternoon passed without incident and soon enough they were getting ready for the evenings event.

The guys showered quickly and Neil was currently teasing Kevin about how long it was taking to do his hair. He was precisely smoothing down every strand while Neil just quickly rubbed some wax through his and left it looking perfect.

"I hate you, you pretty boy" Kevin teased.

"Your just jealous that you'll be propping up the bar while a dance up a storm!" Neil joked.

"Hardly a storm" Kevin laughed. "If I remember right, only one of your dance partners hadn't had a hip replacement last year!"

"That's brutal" Neil laughed. "Brutal, but true."

"It's she coming this year?"

"Not this year," he replied. "Jessica and I aren't seeing each other right now. She thought it might be awkward. "

"Can't say I'm sorry" Kevin said. "I don't think she was a good fit for you. I get a sense of these things, you know" he smiled.

"Yeah, yeah. Can we stop gossiping like girls and get a drink" Neil smiled, shaking his head. "Let's go."

The friends headed out of the locker room and took the elevator down to the lobby. They had been watching the space change over the last couple of days, and the lighting and the music tonight made it look special.

Their first stop was the bar, Kevin for a glass of red and Neil for a large bourbon. They wandered over to a free table and stood waiting, Jo and Audrey would be along soon to keep them company.

When they eventually arrived, almost thirty minutes later, Neil was already taking his first turn on the dance floor with one of older ladies. He had ignored Kevin's jibe about hips as he passed and spent a couple of dances entertaining her.

"No, thank you Mrs. Gunther" they heard him say as they parted ways at the edge of the dancefloor. As he arrived back at the table he shuffled in next to Audrey, bumping her arm to get her to move along a little.

"Started early tonight stud!" Jo laughed.

"Come on, your turn" he said surprising her and grabbing her hand. "I've got to dance with someone under 50 tonight!"

"You're such a charmer!" Jo said smacking his arm. "But ok, let's go."

They chatted idly as they moved around the dancefloor, catching up on each other's day and such.

"So, are you going to ask Audrey to dance tonight too?" she asked

"Think I should?" he replied.

"I do" she replied smiling.

"Maybe I will" he smiled back.

X

The night was getting on and the donors were starting to leave after a successful evening for the hospital. Plenty of money was pledged and the management was very happy with how the whole event had gone.

Neil looked around to try and find Audrey in what was left of the crowd. He spotted her across the room, sat in a stool looking poised and elegant in a long black dress.

He made a beeline for her and started smiling as he made his approach. She was shaking her head, and looking like she would rather be anywhere else right now.

He stopped in front of her and held out his hand.

"Would you like to dance" he asked.

"I don't think..."

"Please?" he pushed, with a small smile. "I think I've danced with everyone he except you. And you're the one I want to dance with the most" he said, getting a little embarrassed and looking to the floor. "Sorry, too much bourbon."

She smiled back at him and she slid down from her seat. She took his hand and led him into the middle of the dancefloor as the first notes of 'The Way You Look Tonight' by Frank Sinatra, rang out.

They stood close, but not too close; they touched, but just the right amount and they smiled at each other shyly as they moved with the music.

"You look beautiful this evening" Neil whispered in her ear, giving her goosebumps and making her smile a little more.

"Thank you," she replied. "You don't scrub up to badly either."

Neither of them wanted the song to end. They didn't speak as they moved around the dancefloor, but they did get a little closer, and they did touch a little more.

Kevin and Jo had made their way back to the table and were watching their friends in their little bubble, unaware of anything or anyone else.

"When will they get their heads out of their asses?" Jo said sounding exasperated. She got her cell phone out of her pocket and began to fiddle with it.

"Glad to see I'm such good company" Kevin said sarcastically.

"It's just a little project I'm working on" Jo said mysteriously as she casually raised her phone and snapped a picture of the dancing couple.

"What are you doing?" Kevin asked looking surprised. "That could be trouble for Audrey if the wrong people saw it."

"They won't, don't worry. I've just got a feeling, that's all. Call me an old romantic."

"Ok, old romantic" he said earning himself a slap on his hand. "Let's go make it look like all the residents dance like that" he said nodding towards Neil and Audrey, taking her hand and leading her back to dance.

They were lost in their own little world when eventually, the music stopped and the lighting was turned up a notch. They startled apart like they had received a shock and Neil opened his mouth to apologise.

"I should go" Audrey said, jumping in. "Kash will be waiting. Thanks for the dance, I enjoyed" she smiled.

She said her goodbyes to her friends and headed quickly to the door. Hopefully Kashal was running a little late and hadn't seen her and Neil dancing so closely.

She was relieved to see him sitting in the drivers seat, tapping away on his laptop, seemingly oblivious to the outside world.

"Hi" she said as she got in.

"Hi" he replied. "Did you enjoy?"

"Yes thanks" she said, holding her breath, waiting for more. But nothing came, he pulled away from the kerb and they drove home in silence.

Back inside, Neil was finishing his drink with Kevin and Jo. He hasn't said much after Audrey dashed out, he hadn't even responded to Kevin's jokes which was very unusual.

"You ok?" Jo asked.

"Yeah" he replied, sounding a little forlorn. "I don't know why I do this to myself."

"Do what?"

"Give myself unattainable goals" he said trying to be non-committal. His friends knew exactly what he meant.

"I've got good money on you two ending up together, so don't get too down about it. Frowning gives you wrinkles, you'll spoil that pretty face" Kevin said, making them all laugh out loud.


	15. Chapter 15

On the ride home, Audrey found herself wishing Kashal would say something. After almost three years of marriage, their conversations had become sparse and meaningless. They still spoke about the mundane things like grocery lists and the weather but even those were now strained and forced. At the start, she was upset that things had cooled off so dramatically, but she wasn't any more. It was the new normal, that was life.

Right now, she was willing him to say something, anything. She wanted to know if he had seen them, if he was upset or just in his usual state of uninterested.

Her answer came as they arrived in the hallway of their condo.

"Do you dance with all your colleagues like that?" he asked flatly as she purposely took her time locking the front door behind them.

She froze.

"Kash, I'm sorry" she said quietly.

"I know we're far from a perfect couple but I thought you respected me enough not to flaunt something like that in my face" he said, sounding sad.

"We're definitely not perfect Kash, and we're hardly a couple at all" she replied, in disbelief. "But you know nothing has happened, and nothing will happen because I'm married to you" she emphasised.

"Is it going to become a problem?" he asked.

"Of course not" she replied hastily. "I made vows, I'm not the type to break them" she said sounding a little offended.

After a few moments of silence he spoke again. "Can you get the hospital to put you on opposite shifts or something so you don't have to see him" Kashal suggested.

"No" she said firmly. "I'm not going to give myself a reputation of being hard to work with, it'll ruin my career. You're going to have to trust me. Just like I trust you when you go off to head office for your meetings once a month" she said getting frustrated.

"I think I'll sleep out here tonight" Kashal said nodding towards the sofa, not even acknowledging her last statement.

"Up to you" she replied as she turned and headed to the bedroom.

They didn't say goodnight.

X

By the time she woke the next morning, he had already left for the office. He had made coffee but there were no other signs of life in the condo, they lived totally separate lives. She thought there might have been a little fallout from their talk last night, it appeared that life had gone back to normal.

She wasn't due at the hospital until after lunch so she pottered around the condo, sorting laundry and clearing up until it was time to go, albeit a little early. She wasn't in the mood for socialising today and hoped that her early arrival would avoid the busy, social shift changeover.

As she arrived, she walked through the lines of workers, moving like ants, cleaning up and packing away from the Gala the night before. Just as quickly as it was turned into an extravagant entertaining space, it was turned back into their daily haunt, even quicker maybe. She had noticed that a few steps ahead Neil, heading the same direction. Any other day, she told herself, she would have called out and they would have walked in together, but not today.

Unfortunately, those thoughts didn't last long because Neil had been stopped in his tracks by Jo who looked like she was dancing on pins. She couldn't help catching up with him just as Jo was starting to tell him about a crazy procedure from that morning.

"Perfect!" Jo exclaimed as she saw Audrey come up on them. "Now I get to tell you together. You're both early, let's grab a coffee."

"Hi, by the way" Audrey said, shaking her head.

"Hi" Neil replied, sounding a little groggy.

"Yeah, yeah, hi" she said. "Come on."

They sat around a small table with the steaming hot drinks, and got ready to listen.

The morning procedure was a scheduled hysterectomy and staging for an advanced stage cancer and not everything had gone to plan.

"We had the uterus, cervix, tubes and ovaries out and we had her abdomen opened from sternum to pelvis" Jo started, but looking around suddenly to see who was nearby. She continued in a much quieter voice which Neil greatly appreciated.

He was cradling his coffee gently in both hand just underneath his nose. It was still too hot to drink but he felt a bit better for inhaling the heady aroma.

"Anyway, we were waaaaay down in the corners of the pelvis digging out lymph nodes here and there when we found a massive one" she exclaimed. "I swear it was about the size of a tennis ball and had a bunch of vessels running through it. That was not good."

"We still had to get it out, but the blood supply was coming right off the internal iliac artery and was really tricky to get on to."

She took a pause to sip her coffee before the story made its crescendo to build the tension. Her friends both smiled at her, knowing how she loved a drama and eventually she continued.

"So, we clipped as many vessels as we could reach and then started cutting. I swear, we lost a full litre of blood in the next 60 seconds before we got control of the bleeding. The poor little first year on suction had no idea what was going on, the field was just flooding. Was scary as hell at the time but it turned out ok. She's in recovery now, Dr Edwards has gone to see the family" she said exhaling loudly at the end.

"Good job you laid off the free bar last night" Audrey smiled. "Maybe you should have too Melendez, you're looking fragile this morning" she said, speaking directly to him for the first time.

"You were fine leaving here, what happened?" Jo asked.

"After party at my place" he said gruffly. When he saw them both raise their eyebrows he continued "by myself, don't worry."

"Drowning your sorrows over Jessica?" Jo asked, fishing for information.

He quickly glanced at Audrey to see if she had reacted. He didn't know if she knew, or even if it would bother her if she did. He didn't know what he was looking for.

Jo's pager broke the awkward silence.

"Patient is waking up, got to go" she said leaving the two of them to finish their drinks.

After a few more minutes, Audrey spoke.

"So, you and Jessica?"

"We're done" he confirmed.

"Sorry" she said automatically.

'Are you?" he asked boldly. He had to much of a headache to get into this now. "I'm sorry, that was rude" he said putting his hand on hers to stop her getting up.

He felt a jolt but left his hand there, his thumb briefly rubbing the soft skin. She felt the jolt and after a couple of seconds, pulled her hand away, but she didn't leave. They sat looking at each other blankly.

"It's just wasn't going to work with the distance" he said finally. He didn't go into the commitment issues they had discussed, he didn't think it appropriate.

"Kash saw us dancing" Audrey said quietly in response. "Asked if anything was 'going on'."

"Sorry" he said, his shoulders dropping. "I didn't think."

"I did" she said quickly. "I knew he might see us, I checked the time, but I said yes anyway."

"Oh."

"Yeah, oh."

"You ok? Did you fight?" he asked cautiously. He knew he was getting close to overstepping the line.

"We don't fight" she replied. "Neither of us cares enough to fight anymore."

They sat a moment longer in silence, halfway between comfortable and awkward. Stuck in no man's land.

Audrey glanced at the clock on the wall, and nodded.

"We should go" she said standing up. Neil nodded and followed suit.

"I would" he said quietly as they walked together towards the elevators.

"Pardon?" she asked.

"I would" he repeated. "I would care enough to fight with you" he said solemnly, looking straight ahead.

She stopped in her tracks and let him keep walking. She didn't think getting in the elevator with him right now was a good idea.


	16. Chapter 16

They were all worked hard over the next few months and each one of them was impressing Dr Glassman with their skills and dedication. He had continued to note how close they were as friends and how they provided endless, unwavering support for each other through the good times, and the not so good. He had actually taken to thinking how he could get them all to stay on at the end of their residencies, that kind of camaraderie would only be a benefit to the hospital.

Before they could think twice, the festive period was approaching fast. On a rare occasion where they all had time for lunch at all, they found themselves sitting at a table in the cafeteria with Christmas songs playing quietly in the background. As it turned out, no matter how quiet they were, they were too loud for one particular member of their group.

"It's December 5th for goodness sake" Kevin pointed out to them, despite the fact they were all well aware. "Can't they wait a little bit longer before they start playing this crap?" he asked rhetorically.

"What's bugging you?" Audrey asked him as the others looked on curiously.

"Nothing" he snapped. "It's all just too happy and joyful. It's pissing me off."

Neil raised his eyebrows and tried to turn the topic to something else.

"Have you thought about going for the Fellowship here?" he asked Kevin. "Rumour has it that Dr. Richards is shopping around elsewhere. By the time everything goes through, you could be first in line. "

This piqued his interest briefly until he saw the hospital maintenance staff dragging along a Christmas tree of giant proportions which was intended for the entrance lobby.

"Oh for goodness sake" he huffed as he stood abruptly and stalked away muttering to himself.

"What on earth is that all about?" Audrey asked. That was certainly not normal behaviour for Kevin.

"His parents" Jo said quietly. "They told him a couple of months ago that if he continued with his current 'lifestyle choice' then he was no longer welcome there. I don't think he can go home for Christmas" she said sadly.

"That's crap" Neil exclaimed, causing a few heads to turn in their direction.

"Shush now, it's still not public knowledge" Jo said. "He'd be even more pissed if you kicked him out of the closet before he was ready" she scolded.

"But he's the only one if us who actually has leave, the rest of us have to stay here anyway. We need to figure something out we can't leave him by himself" Audrey said animatedly.

"Last he said, he was cancelling his leave. He wants to be working, says it will take his mind off things" Jo said sounding sad for their friend.

After throwing a few ideas back and forth they came up with a plan. They would have dinner at Neil's place. Their shifts were varied and in some cases overlapped, but there was a small window of a couple hours where they could do something.

"My place is only small" Neil said. "But we can get four around the table. I'll borrow a couple of chairs from the lady downstairs."

The last comment was met with raised eyebrows and caused Neil to scoff. "She's almost a hundred years old, I swear. I just help her with some stuff now and again like changing lights and carrying her bags. You two are like children" he said defensively as they continued to giggle.

"So you need to be at the hospital by 4pm yes? Do you trust us to lock up if we stay to clear up?" Jo asked.

"Of course, let's do it" he said.

"And your good Aud?"

"Yes, Kash will be with his parents in Denver for a few days so I'm good to go. Whatever you need."

With the wheels of their plan set in motion, they happily headed off back into the depths of the hospital so finish off their shifts.

X

When Jo casually informed Kevin of what they intended to do, his eyes brimmed with tears and he engulfed her into a bear hug. His mood shifted instantly and he was looking forward again which they were all very glad to see. The spring was back in his step and everyone around could see it.

The preparation for their little Christmas dinner was meticulous, it needed to be. Jo was working Christmas Eve and into the early hours of Christmas morning. She would head home for a few hours after her shift to sleep then head over to Neil's to help however she was needed.

Audrey was only due to finish at 11am Christmas morning so would likely go straight to Neil's and catch up on any sleep later that day after they had cleared up.

Neil was working Christmas Eve but then not due at the hospital until 4pm the following day which allowed plenty of time to get things set in motion.

And finally, after cancelling his leave, Kevin had secured himself the graveyard shift and was due into St Bonaventure by 8pm that evening.

Happy with their plans and arrangements of who was bringing what and when, they were confident that it would all go without a hitch.

X

The weeks coming up to Christmas were always extremely busy and this year was no different. The Emergency Room was always particularly crazy with people abandoning sensible behaviours during parties and events and often ending up worse for wear.

There were a large number of people brought in under the influence of alcohol with various outcomes. Some had their stomachs pumped, others needed stitches after brawling and one poor individual who required surgery after his attempts to impress a lady dancing on the table ended in a tib-fib fracture which need plates and pins.

They all took great pleasure in watching Neil fight of the advances of inebriated young ladies as he attempted to treat them until eventually he begged the triage nurses to share the load a bit.

A week before the big day, they treated a guy who had fallen from his roof in an attempt to have the most extravagant Christmas decorations on the street. A neighbor had called an ambulance when he had found him lying on his front lawn. He had slipped from a ladder while trying to carry another reel of lights to his roof. He argued that he was doing it for his children who turned out to be a couple of surly teenagers who actually preferred their father in once piece, instead of their house looking like a grotto.

Christmas Eve brought in a number of walking wounded for treatments after a last minute sale at the local mall had turned ugly. The crowds had been pushing forwards and once the doors opened, the surge knocked a poor employee off their feet but not a single person stopped to help them up. The employee needed sutures which Kevin did seamlessly, assuring the young lady that if it did scar, then it would be barely visible.

When their shifts finished on Christmas Eve, they were both more than ready to head home.

"See you tomorrow!" Neil called as he jogged to his car.

"Yes indeed!" Called Kevin. "Can't wait!"

X

Christmas morning, Neil surfaced at a decent hour and immediately switched on his little oven. Most of what they needed was at Neil's in various states of readiness, but the turkey was priority.

Once that was safely roasting away, he spent some time on a call with his parents. They weren't actually too far away logistically, but just far enough that going there for dinner would have been a stretch with having to work later in the day.

He'd gone from the call back to preparing dinner and was enthralled in what he was doing until he heard a knock at the door.

"Come in" he yelled. "Hope you remembered your wine, you drunkard!"

"Um, Jo was bringing the wine" Audrey replied as she walked into the kitchen area. "Isn't she here yet?"

Neil looked up and quickly tried to disguise the look of shock that had crossed his face. She had seen it flitter past and noted that she was not quite who Neil was expecting.

"Isn't she here yet?" Audrey asked, not really needing an answer. "Do you want me to come back later?"

"What, no! Why?" He asked, maybe sounding a little more aggressive than he meant to. They had never talked about what Neil had said the night after the Gala. Neither of them knew how to bring it up and the moment had passed the minute Neil stepped into that elevator without her.

"Just, well, you know" she started, sounding nervous. "Maybe it's not a great idea that we're here alone?"

"I'm sure we can control ourselves" he said with a soft smile. "Now come here and help me with these veggies, they aren't going to chop themselves."

"Let me check on Jo first, I'll be right back" she replied, smiling right back. She walked back into the small hallway and let out a big sigh as she leaned back against the wall. She took out her cell and called her friend who answered on the second ring sounding a little groggy.

"Where are you?" Audrey asked. "It's almost midday."

"No way! I'm so sorry, I overslept" she replied with a hint of panic in her voice. "See you as soon as."

"Sure, hurry up and don't forget the wine" Audrey said before hanging up.

"Do you think she suspected?" Kevin asked Jo, once they were sure the call was finished.

"No, of course not" Jo replied. "That was my best 'just woken up' voice. Hopefully those two will take the chance to talk a bit."

"Or something else?" Kevin teased.

"I don't think that'll happen" Jo smiled. "But maybe there'll be a bit less tension. The stupid thing is, they don't even see it, they think they are carrying on as normal" she laughed.

"We can only hope" he replied.

X

Audrey headed back inside to find Neil still stood at the kitchen counter.

"All ok?" he asked.

"Yeah, over slept apparently" she replied.

"Apparently?"

"Yeah, I'm sure I heard Kev in the background chuckling at something."

They stood a moment, not sure of what to do next but Neil fixed that.

"Come on then, peel those potatoes" he smiled. "They won't cook themselves."

She shucked off her jacket and held it up with a questioning look.

"Just through there" he said pointing at a closed door.

She covered the small distance in a few steps, opened the door and found herself in the doorway of Neil's bedroom. She took a breath and stepped inside, briefly talking a moment to appreciate what she was seeing. She quickly threw her jacket onto the bottom of the big, perfectly made bed and headed back to the kitchen.

"Here" he said passing her a peeler. "Get to it" he smiled widely and she happily obliged.

They moved around the small kitchen taking particular care not to touch each other, nervous that there would be another spark that they couldn't run from today. They worked in harmony, casually chatting away for the next thirty minutes or so and were pretty much done, still with no sign of Jo and Kevin.

Audrey moved into the living area to check the table and put out the cutlery while Neil kept an eye on dinner. When she was done, she came back to look for the wine glasses. After opening a few doors, she was still at a blank.

"Up there" he nodded. "No, not there" he continued as she opened the wrong door again. "Hang on" he said and he moved closer to put his hand on her hip to hold her still as he went to reach past her up into the cupboard behind.

He heard a sharp intake of breath from her and stepped back a little when he realised just how close they were.

Just a little though.

As he looked at her, about to apologise, a looked flashed across her face so briefly, that if he wasn't staring so intently, he would have missed it.

She moved one hand in between them and placed it gently on his chest, but she didn't push him away. She closed her eyes briefly and thought of her fingers tracing the inked antlers underneath.

When she opened them again, he was still just as close, his eyes black and looking at her with an intensity she hadn't felt for years. He took a deep breath and her eyes shifted to watch her hand rise and fall with the movement of his chest.

"Neil" she whispered making him blink for what seemed like the first time in an eternity. "We shouldn't."

He didn't reply. He reached up and got a glass from behind her, the movement edging him slightly closer. When he moved to repeat the action again, he felt pressure from the hand she had so firmly planted on his chest. He stopped.

They were mere inches apart, noses almost touching and all sensible thought disappeared from Audreys head. She shifted again and put their lips to just millimetres apart.

"Hi, we're here! Merry Christmas!" they heard as the front door burst open and Jo and Kevin bustled in. They startled apart looking sheepishly at each other while their friends went about unpacking the wine and desserts they had brought seemingly oblivious to the moment they had just disturbed.

They didn't step to far away from each other, feeling it would look suspicious, but neither of them could help from smiling, probably like idiots. That brief moment had almost made for a very Happy Christmas for both of them.


	17. Chapter 17

"Neil, that was amazing" said Kevin, putting his cutlery down and leaning back on his chair. "I'm absolutely stuffed."

"I second that" smiled Jo, sipping at her wine. "I think I'd happily let you cook for me anytime you like."

"And what about the potatoes?" Audrey laughed "I peeled the potatoes, you know!"

"Yes, they were great too" Kevin chuckled in reply. "But honestly Neil, you'll make someone a great wife one day!"

"Well you can all thank my Mom" he said. "Taught me almost everything I know. When they were busy with Gabi, I'd sort dinner" he smiled. "It happened quite a lot" he added.

He pushed back his chair and went to pick up his plate when Jo stopped him.

"No, no, no! You guys did the all hard work. Our turn now, least we can do swing as we were late" she said pointing between Kevin and herself.

"You two go sit down" Kevin added. "Have a break before you head in" he said to Neil. "Goodness knows what carnage these two left us to clear up when we get in tonight" he laughed

"Sure, ok" Neil replied. He headed to the fridge, picked out a bottle and headed to the small sofa. "I'm not going to argue with that."

"And you" Jo said, nodding at Audrey. "Off you go."

"But shouldn't Kev relax before his shift?" Audrey argued.

Jo leaned in close as if to clear her plate and whispered "We're not daft, we disturbed something when we arrived earlier. Go talk to him."

"Besides, I've got a few hours after Neil goes to put my feet up while you two drink wine. Go. Sit" he said, pointing at the space next to Neil.

Audrey picked up her glass and turned to go take a seat, missing the look that passed between Jo and Kevin. She nudged at Neil's knee with her own to get him to shift a bit and make space.

They sat back on Neil's sofa watching Kevin and Jo potter around in the kitchen, washing the dishes and putting away leftovers. One of Neil's legs was stretched out in front of him, with his bottle resting on his thigh. The other leg was bent meaning his knee lolled to one side, gently leaning against hers.

She looked down at where they touched and fuelled by the second glass of wine, she took a deep breath and began to speak.

"So, earlier on, in the kitchen?" Audrey started in a whisper. "Before Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum arrived?"

"Yeah?" he replied, looking straight ahead.

"Would you have, you know?" she asked apprehensively, feeling a little silly.

"In a heartbeat" he replied casually, smiling to himself as he took a sip of his non alcoholic beer.

She blushed and looked down into her glass, not sure how to reply to his honesty.

"Good job we didn't though. If I'd started kissing you, I'm not sure I'd have been able to stop" he said in a matter of fact tone. "Could have made quite the show for them" he said nodding towards their friends in the kitchen.

She still didn't say anything.

"Besides, it probably wasn't the best idea" he continued, shocking her a little. When he saw her reaction he felt bad and scrambled to recover.

"Not in the way you think" he said cautiously. "I'd have felt bad afterwards, and so would you. I think we've known each other long enough to know we aren't into having some sordid affair. And I wouldn't want to have pressured you into that" he said smiling at her

She finally looked at him and he saw a shy smile start to brighten her face until it reached her eyes. He had never been any good at hiding feelings so had just taken to talking things through instead. He got the feeling that she was the complete opposite, it could make for a very interesting relationship going forward, he though to himself.

"We gonna be ok here?" he asked.

"Absolutely" she replied, smiling wider.

X

Around an hour later, Neil stretched out and made to get up from his comfortable spot on the sofa with Audrey. She had learned into him a little more as time had passed and he missed the contact as he moved. Jo and Kevin had finished clearing up some time ago and were perched on the dining chairs while they chatted away animatedly.

"I'd best go get changed, I've got to leave in a bit" he said sounding quite disappointed. As he moved away, Audrey felt cooler air hit her upper thigh and a small shiver passed over her.

"Bit cosy there weren't you" Jo teased as Neil moved out of earshot.

"Oh hush" Audrey admonished. "Don't be ridiculous."

"Did you talk about it?" Kevin asked.

"About what?"

"About what we interrupted when we arrived earlier" Jo said. "We're not blind!"

"Oh, that" she smiled sheepishly as she took another sip. "We're fine."

"Really! That's all we get?" Kevin exclaimed as Jo hit his arm to quieten him.

"Yeah, that's all you get" she smiled as she got up to refill her glass.

"You're impossible, Lim!" Jo admonished. "Go ask him if he wants to take any leftovers in with him tonight" she said nodding towards the closed door. "Kev, do you want a sandwich for later, the cafeteria will be on skeleton staff too?" she asked.

"No way, I'm not going in there!" Audrey exclaimed.

"What?" Jo replied with mock surprise. "Thought you were friends?"

"Fine" she huffed as she turned towards the door.

She tapped the door gently, so gently that he likely didn't hear anything. As she turned back to Jo, she shrugged her shoulders as if to say 'i tried'.

Having none of that, Jo reached past her and knocked harder and promptly walked back into the kitchen while Audrey stood, shaking her head.

"Yeah" came the muffled response from behind the closed door. He sounded much further away than she expected.

After trying to ask him through the closed door a couple of times with no luck she heard "hang on" and the door was pulled open.

He stood there with just his suit trousers on, with a towel around his neck, wiping the shaving foam off his face. He stood there, waiting for Audrey to speak. She couldn't help herself as her eyes flickered down and back up in the most brief of seconds. If he noticed, he didn't say anything but he smiled as she caught his eye and asked "What's up?"

"Do you want a sandwich for tonight?" Jo called from behind her, as it seemed Audrey had lost the ability to speak.

"Sure, that'd be great" he replied. "I'm almost done here, I'll be right out" he said retreating back inside

"I can't believe you did that to me" she whispered quite loudly to Jo, feeling a little frustrated at being put in that situation.

"Next time I get to knock" Kevin called over. "I didn't know he was hiding all that under his shirt" he said laughing, breaking the tension.

Audrey choked on her wine, and laughter ensued. They were still chuckling as Neil reappeared, fully dressed and ready to go.

"See you later" he said to Kevin. "Just post the key when your done, it's a spare" he smiled at Audrey.

"Sure thing" she replied.

"Come here" Jo said, speaking her arms to engulf him in a bear hug. "Thanks for this" she whispered in his ear. "I know he loved it."

"Anytime" he whispered back.

"I want one of those" Kevin exclaimed, getting up to hug his friend. "Merry Christmas Neil and thank you."

Free from Kevin's embrace, Neil turned to look at the last person in the room. The one he wanted to hug the most. They stared for a moment and he saw her give a little nod. With that, he stepped forward and she stepped right into his embrace.

"Merry Christmas Aud" he whispered as he dropped the smallest of kisses just below her ear

"Merry Christmas Neil" she smiled.


	18. Chapter 18

After he headed out the door and down to his car, he sat a moment before he started the engine. He'd had quite an emotional day so far with his friends and hoped that the shift tonight would not throw any curveballs his way.

He looked up to the window of his apartment that faced the street and sighed. He would have given a handsome sum to have been able to stay with them tonight, but duty called.

The mood inside had fallen a little flat in the moments after he'd left for work. The three of them sat quietly, sipping at their drinks until Jo decided that the celebrations needed to restart.

"Come on" she said to Audrey. "Top up our glasses. We're not sitting here like this on Christmas Day!"

Happy to oblige, Audrey stood and headed to the fridge. She poured both of them a healthy serving of the extremely nice wine they were working their way through. A thought briefly entered her mind that they were hitting it a little too hard but that thought left just as quickly and she handed a glass back to Jo.

Kevin sat with a coffee and watched as the ladies got more chatty as the wine released their inhibitions.

"So whats the deal with your folks" Jo asked Kevin. "Have you spoken to them recently?"

"Not since I shared my news" he said with a tinge of sadness. "I think it'll be a while until that happens" he said.

"Well they are idiots" Audrey said boldly. "You're one if the most amazing guys I know and you should be able to love whoever you want."

"Oh really!" Kevin replied laughing as he got ready to pounce on the chance to change the subject. "You think it's easy to love whoever you want you little hypocrite!"

Audrey cringed as she realised what she had opened the door too.

"So how are things with you and Kash?" Jo asked.

Audrey dropped her head onto the back of the sofa and groaned. "Same old" she replied.

"So, still a glorified roommate then?" Kevin asked causing Jo to snort into her glass. "What! Sharing the bills and no sex, right?"

Audrey couldn't help but laugh at Kevin's brutal honesty. It was one of the things she loved about him, but it did hurt a little.

"So remind us again why you're still with him?"

"I've no idea" she answered honestly. "Security?"

"How long are you going to stay with him if he's not what you want?" Jo asked with a frown.

"I don't know" replied Audrey. "It's hard to just call it quits. Neither of us wants to admit it" she smiled sadly.

There was a brief pause and they both watched her as she struggled with whether to share something more. Eventually, it came.

"He's been offered a job in Washington, and he's going to take it" Audrey said looking in to her glass. "He's been working on a big case for a while and it put him up for a great promotion."

"Okay" Jo replied, trying to stay calm. "Are you going to go with him?"

"I'm going to stay behind to finish this year, for sure" she replied, not committing to an answer.

"But then what?" Jo pushed. "You can't leave."

"There are great hospitals in Washington for my third year" she started but her friend just began shaking her head.

"Don't" Jo snapped, holding up her hand. "What about us? What about Neil?"

"What about him? I'm married to Kashal, not Neil" she snapped.

"Don't we know it" Kevin added, rolling his eyes. "Why follow him if he means nothing to you? Stay here with people who care about you. Not just Neil, us too" he said, gesturing at the group.

Audrey put her head in her hand and rubbed her temples, not sure of what to say. She knew they were talking sense but the stigma of ending her marriage weighed heavily on her. It was not a decision she was taking lightly.

"I can't let Neil be any part of my decision" she said at last. "I can't put that pressure on whatever it is we have."

Jo and Kevin nodded in agreement but they weren't quite done.

"Ok, but in the interest of full disclosure, to help you decide, you should know why Neil and Jessica called it quits."

"That's not important" Audrey argued.

"But it is" Kevin argued. "It has a little something to do with you two sharing a bunk on the night of the Mass Casualty in the summer."

She looked at him with a confused frown.

"Jessica heard at the nurses station that you two were cuddled up and stormed off" Jo confined. "By all accounts, she didn't like that and decided she didn't want their relationship to stay casual. She didn't like the idea of him and you."

"Him and anyone" Audrey suggested.

"No" Kevin confirmed. "Him and you."

Audrey shook her head.

"She wanted to commit, he said no" Jo finished.

"He told me it was because of the distance and the pressure from work" Audrey said.

"Of course he would" Jo laughed. "You're both as bad as each other."

"Just stay Aud, see what happens. We both know we disturbed something earlier when our little plan backfired" Kevin admitted.

"I knew it!" Audrey exclaimed. "I knew I could hear you when I called Jo. You two are incorrigible!"

"Can't say it wouldn't have worked though, given another five minutes" Jo teased.

Audrey blushed furiously and found her the bottom of her glass very interesting as they gentle ribbed her.

"If we hadn't shown up, would you have?" Kev asked.

"What?" she asked feigning innocence.

"Kissed him?" he pushed.

"In a heartbeat" she replied using his phrase from earlier. She laughed while Kevin and Jo congratulated themselves on a successful plot with a series of 'I told you' and 'I knew it'!

"Right" Kevin finally announced. "Time for me to get going. Patients await" he said as he stood to gather his things.

A look of panic passed across Audreys face which they both caught.

"We won't say a word, don't worry. Not our place" Kevin said. "But don't leave it too long, if he hears a rumour..."

"I know, I know" she replied.

"Thanks for today, you wonderful people" he said as he kissed them both goodbye. "Try not to get to drunk" he teased.

"To late for that" Jo announced, holding up her glass.

X

Around 4 a.m., Neil stumbled up the stairs and fiddled with the lock on the door to his apartment. The shift at the hospital had not been particularly challenging but he had found it difficult to concentrate. He was looking forward to falling face first into his bed and sleeping for a solid eight hours.

He quickly got himself a drink of water before turning in. He looked around the apartment and apart from a couple of wine glasses left on the counter, the place looked perfect. A wistful smile crossed his face as he recalled the days events.

He started untucking his shirt as he walked to the door of his bedroom. He pushed the door open with his foot and squinted into the darkness, his bed wasn't empty.

Two fully dressed forms were sprawled on top of his sheets and were both snoring away. He smiled at them and shook his head, grabbed a blanket from the trunk at the bottom of the bed and headed back to the sofa. Kicking off his shoes, he tried to get comfortable. After a few moments, he ditched his shirt and pants leaving him in his underwear and settled in for a good few hours sleep.

He was woken a few hours later by the smell of fresh coffee permeating his dreams. Audrey had woken around nine, looked over at Jo and figured they would definitely be needing some strong coffee this morning. She groaned as she lifted her head but powered through.

She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw him, curled up in a ball on his sofa and felt a tinge of guilt. His bed had been very comfortable and he was stuck out here after a long shift, on a sofa that was too short to lie on properly.

Creeping past, she put on a pot of coffee and turned to rinse the glasses in the sink. When she turned back, he was watching her.

"Morning" he mumbled with a smile as he attempted to stretch out to get rid of the knots from sleeping on the sofa. Giving up, he stood and stretched up on his toes, reaching towards the ceiling and letting out a groan.

She watched. She took in his form from top to toe. His strong arms as they reached up, the gap that appeared between his under shirt and his waistband, the toned legs and finally back up to his face which currently held a cocky smirk.

"Coffee ready?" He asked as he sat back down to pull on his trouser pants. He didn't think that walking around in his underwear was the best idea right now.

"Just about" she smiled as he came to stand next to her. She looked as he took a sip and closed his eyes as the hot liquid soothed him.

"Enjoy last night?" he asked with a smile, nodding towards the collection of empty bottles next to his sink.

"Yeah, but paying for it this morning" she smiled at him. "Sorry we stole your bed."

"Not a problem having you in my bed" he replied casually then looking alarmed as he realised how it actually sounded out loud. "You know what I mean" he stammered trying to gloss over the statement.

"Sure" she smirked, seeing the cool, calm Neil Melendez a little flustered was fun. She'd like to see that again.

They both relaxed again and were stood there when they heard a knock from the inside of his bedroom door.

"It's it safe to come out?" Jo asked, trying to hide the fact she was grinning like a Cheshire cat.

"Of course" Audrey called. "We're decent."

Neil's eyebrows almost hit the ceiling.

"She's gonna think we weren't at some point now, you know what she's like!" Neil whispered.

"I do" she whispered back.

And that's what Jo saw as she came out. Her two friends, stood shoulder to shoulder whispering to each other with smiles on their faces. Happy to see them happy, that would have to do for now.


	19. Chapter 19

She could have sworn she hadn't seen him at all over the next seven days while she was working and getting ready for her interviews. Kevin and Jo were being great, quizzing her and helping her prep which she found very helpful. If she had looked a little harder, she would have known that he was still around, attending consults and such but the hole he left in their social group was massive. They all missed him.

""So, think you're ready" Kevin asked as they wrapped up their last quiz session.

"As ready as I'll ever be" Audrey replied, closing the notebook in front of her. "I'll have some time on the flight to go over things again."

"What time is your flight?" Jo asked.

"Nine" she said. "Early start tomorrow, I should get going."

"How are you getting there?"

"I've booked a cab" she confirmed. "Easier than looking for a lift."

"And Kashal is meeting you there?" Jo pushed.

"No, he's busy. My old college friend Laura is going to pick me up. We haven't seen each other in a while so it'll be good to catch up" Audrey said with a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes.

Kevin and Jo looked at each other, they were thinking the same thing but neither of them said it. They didn't want to stress Audrey out before her big day, despite not agreeing with her decision.

"Do you want us to pick you up when you get back? We can borrow Neil's car, he is going to a bachelor party over the weekend so he won't need it" Kevin asked.

"Bachelor party?" Audrey asked, ignoring the point of the question.

"His college roommate, Adam. He's Best Man in a couple of months. You know about that right?" Jo continued.

"Sure, I just thought he was stuck working?"

"He went to see Glassman and they figured something out. Those two seem quite close" Jo said, almost to herself. "A bit last minute but he's going on Friday."

"Oh" she said flatly.

"You can't expect the guy to be a monk Aud" Kevin exclaimed, defending his friend. "He put himself out there and got shot down. He deserves to let his hair down."

Jo looked at him, eyes wide. She couldn't believe he'd actually said it.

"You're right" she replied. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to make this awkward and I certainly don't want you guys to have to choose between us" she said sadly. "A ride would be great, thanks."

X

She thought she would leave town without seeing him but it turned out she would literally bump into him as she left the hospital that night.

"Sorry!" he exclaimed bending to help pick up the scattered papers without realising who he had actually bumped into.

"It's fine" she replied, looking down on the to of his head as he picked up the last few loose pages.

"Hi" he said simply, as he stood and found himself face to face with Audrey.

"Hi" came her simple response as she fidgeted, trying to balance all the books he had piled into her arms.

"Do you need a hand?" Neil asked. "Kash is coming for you, right?"

"Erm, no" she mumbled. "He went to DC last weekend, he won't be back. I'll sort this lot out and catch the next bus, don't worry."

There were a few moments of awkward silence while neither of them knew what to say. They didn't want to fight again, especially in such a public place so silence seemed the best option.

"I'll give you a ride" he said suddenly, breaking the stalemate but immediately kicking himself. He didn't really want to be in an enclosed space with her right now.

"Honestly, don't worry" she replied trying to brush the suggestion off.

"It's no trouble. I'll even drop you at the end of the street again if you want" he said with a soft smile.

"But aren't you meant to be..." she asked nodding her head towards the main staircase.

"I'm early" he shrugged. "I've got time."

"Thanks" she smiled, looking down at her papers and back at him. "I'd appreciate that."

X

Minutes later, he pulled out of the lot with his passenger. 'What am I doing' briefly crossed his mind but he shook his head to dispel the feeling.

They sat in silence for most of the ride with the little conversation they had based on mundane things like the abnormally mild weather and the local sports team. Safe topics.

In what seemed like no time at all, they were sat at the kerb outside her place.

"Aud" he started as she moved to get out. He stopped himself from reaching out to touch her arm.

She stopped and looked back at him, waiting for him to continue.

"Good luck tomorrow" he finished. "You'll smash it, just like you always do" he smiled.

"Thanks" she replied, relieved that his words weren't the start of any more drama. "Enjoy your weekend" she added as she got out and turned to pick up her bag.

"Thanks" he replied, smiling a little awkwardly. "It should be fun."

"Don't drink too much" she teased. "Can't have shaky hands next week" she laughed.

"Can't guarantee that" he smiled. "See you next week."

"Sure, bye."

"Bye, Aud."

He watched as she headed inside, and turned the car around to head back to the hospital, their final exchange replaying over and over in his head. Should he have apologised? Should he have said more? Who knew?

X

He was cutting it fine making it to the hospital in time for his shift and as he rushed towards the locker room, he ran into Kevin on the way out.

"Bit late" he questioned.

"Yeah, just drove Audrey home" he replied casually. "Got stuck in traffic on the way back. Hate being late" he said as he bundled himself through the door.

Kevin followed him back inside.

"Did you guys talk?" he asked Neil.

"No, we sat in silence" Neil replied sarcastically.

"No need for that" Kevin replied. "I'll have you know, I had your back this morning when she found you were off to Vegas this weekend."

"Sorry, sorry" Neil said as he pulled his scrub top over his head. "I'm just frustrated with the whole thing."

"I know" Kevin replied. "But she's made herself clear, she's not going to leave Kashal so I'm afraid it's friends or nothing."

"I don't want nothing" he admitted quietly.

"So get this shift done, go to Vegas with your friends and find yourself someone cute to hook up with. Get this thing out of your system" Kevin said with a smile.

"Might be the best idea" Neil admitted back. "Let's get this over with then."


	20. Chapter 20

She landed in Dulles International on the Thursday evening and as she walked out into the foyer, she saw Laura. She was holding a handwritten sign just saying 'NERD' with a big smile on her face.

"Hi" she said, smiling widely and embracing her friend. "You look great, how have you been?"

"Hi Aud" Laura smiled. "I'm good. It's so great to see you. You ok? Nervous?"

"No" she replied. "Should be quite simple. I mean, who wouldn't want me?!"

"Always the modest one" Laura laughed rolling her eyes. "Come on, let's get dinner."

A short while later they were sat in a booth at a local restaurant. For a Thursday night, it was quite busy but they had squirreled themselves away in private corner so they could catch up properly. With both of them working all sorts of hours it had been a while since they'd had the chance.

"So why didn't Kashal pick you up tonight?" was Laura's opener.

"Wow, going straight for the jugular I see!"

"Don't get defensive. I've known you two a long time, I was at the wedding remember. I'm just worried about you" she said taking Audrey's hand.

Audrey slumped back in her seat a little while she tried to think of the right words.

"I don't know if I'm doing the right thing" she quietly admitted to Laura. "I've made friends in San Jose which you know isn't easy for me. They're new but they are good friends, we've been through a lot already."

Laura just sat and listened. She knew that getting Audrey Lim to talk about feelings was a quite the milestone moment so she wasn't going to interrupt.

"We work together" she continued. "We're a good group, we push each other, support each other and I don't know if i could do that all again at a new place."

Laura waited, it seemed as though Audrey was on pause.

"There is more?" Laura said knowingly. "What's going on?"

"I may have had it pointed out to me, that my marriage isn't exactly conventional" she said. "I'm starting to think I shouldn't just follow him on autopilot."

"The marriage thing isn't news to anyone but you. Who finally got you to hear it?" Laura asked with interest.

"One of the guys on my program, Neil" Audrey said, suddenly finding the bottom of her glass very interesting.

"Aud?" Laura said simply, knowing there was still more to it.

"I like him, and he seems to like me." She saw the look cross Laura's face. "Nothing has ever happened."

"But you want it to, right"

"I'm married" Audrey said as if it had become her mantra.

"If you want to stay married, work at it. You can't just switch off and go through the motions. You'll be miserable."

"What about Mom? She'll still be in California. I'd feel awful leaving her alone" Audrey said trying to redirect Laura's attention.

"She won't be alone Aud, she has your aunt's. You need to decide based on what's best for you."

"I'm going to these interviews" she said as a matter of fact.

"I'd expect nothing less" Laura smiled. "But think about whether it's what 'you' want? Best for 'your' career?"

"I know, I know" she said. "Now let's change the subject to something more interesting than me. Any cute guys at your new job" Audrey teased as the conversation turned and they started catching up on the last year.

X

Because he had booked onto the trip last minute, he flew into McCarran alone that Friday morning, a day after the rest of the group. He'd seen pictures on social media of their first night out so expected he'd find them all still fast asleep or maybe suffering from hangovers around the pool.

He walked out into the sunshine and looked over at the line of people waiting for cabs and sighed, he should have booked a transfer but it was all so last minute. He put on his sunglasses, jammed a baseball cap onto his head and started towards the queue.

"Where are you going handsome" he heard someone call from a nearby private rental. He didn't respond, he assumed they were cat-calling someone else.

"You in the hat" he heard, so this time he turned and saw a couple of ladies leaning out of the side of the minivan.

"Hi" he replied cautiously.

"Where are you staying?" one of them asked again. "We're could give you a ride!"

"It's fine" he replied smiling. "The line is moving quite quickly."

"Come on!" another called. "Where's your sense of adventure?" And those words, that question in particular piqued his attention.

"I'm at the Wynn" he replied. "Are you passing?"

"Even better" she replied. "We're staying there too. Hop in."

"Thanks" he said with a smile as he perched himself on a seat next to a quiet lady, tucking his bag by his feet.

"Why are you in Sin City?" one of the ladies asked from further back.

"Bachelor Party" he replied. "They all arrived yesterday, so I'm playing catch up."

"We're on a divorce party!" another called. "We're here to get Nicola laid" she said laughing.

The lady he was sat next to sank into her seat. "I'm so sorry" she mumbled. "They don't get out much."

"Nicola I presume" he said smiling.

"For my sins" she replied with half a smile.

"I'm Neil" he said holding out his hand which she took, and shook gently as she smiled more genuinely.

What should have been a ten minute drive took twice that, due to the busy weekend traffic. They eventually arrived at the Wynn and after he had helped them unload their cases, he thanked them and headed inside.

He joined the queue for check-in and heard them coming up behind him not long after. He laughed and shook his head as he heard "Don't worry, we've got a bunch of dares for you, Nic. You'll get at least a little bit of action this weekend, we promise."

"I just want to sit by a pool, drink some cocktails and gossip with you girls. Don't you think I've had enough trouble with men, I deserve a break!"

"Hi handsome!" he heard as they saw him in the line a little further along. "What do you think? You think our girl needs some action?"

He turned to see her looking at him apologetically with a blush rising in her cheeks.

"I think she should do whatever she wants, it's her party" he replied, giving her a quick smile. She mouthed a 'thank you' in response and he smiled a bit more.

He turned back just in time to be called to the desk, and once he had registered, he headed upstairs. On arranging the party originally, Neil thought that Adam would be safer in a room by himself, away from some of the potentially raucous behaviour expected by a few other members of the group. Now he had booked on, the only space left available was in Adams room but neither of them minded at all, it would be just like old times.

He found the room empty on arrival, so changed quickly and headed back towards the pool to look for his friends.

He heard a couple of them before he could see them and smiled widely as he walked out into the sunshine.

He heard a chorus of "Neil!" followed by "Your round, lightweight!"

He was greeted by a series of hand shakes and back slaps and a great bear hug by Adam.

"So glad you could make it" he smiled as he held him by the shoulders. "I'm not sure I'd have survived otherwise."

"Heavy night, last night?"

"Heaviest ever!" Adam replied.

"Want a soda instead?" Neil asked.

"I do, but what about them?" Adam asked missing at the rest of the group.

"Sod them" Neil replied. "You do what your like, it's your party" he smiled as he took off his shirt, threw it down by his towel and headed off to the bar.

X

Friday for Audrey was very different. Dressed in her business suit, she was browsing some notes waiting to be called into the interview at Georgetown.

She heard her name, rose from her seat and took a deep breath. 'He goes nothing' she thought to herself.

Almost an hour later she was back in the foyer waiting for her cab to Washington Hospital Centre. She imagined that the interview would be much the same.

'Why are you looking to leave your current program? Have you decided on your speciality? Which route are you looking to take?' were asked and she was confident she'd answered them well enough.

Her second interview was after lunch but she preferred to be onsite ready and grab something from their cafeteria, to be sure not to be late. While she sat, she called Jo just to check in on her lift for tomorrow.

"Of course, we're all good" Jo said. Audrey could hear her smiling down the line. "We'll be there!"

After passing the time for a few minutes, Jo had to get back to work so Audrey turned her focus back to her lunch.

The interview came and went following much the same format as the one from this morning and after she had finished she called Kashal. They were going to meet for dinner but she wasn't particularly looking forward to it. Some of the questions she had answered today had made her think on her choice a lot more. She was wondering whether seeing him tonight would make a difference to her decision.

They met at a restaurant downtown which was pretty quiet for a Friday, but it was still early.

"How were the interviews" he asked her, taking a sip of his wine. His question surprised her, normally life was all about Kashal, her career was a mere footnote to his.

"They went well, I think" she replied, fiddling with the napkin. This whole thing felt awkward. "I should find out next week."

"Good" he said. "Will you take a place if you're offered?"

"Of course" she replied, a little shocked.

"Why?" he asked quite abruptly. "Have you missed me these last two weeks?"

"Not really" she whispered, reeling a little from his question.

"Pardon?"

"Not really" she said, a little louder, surprised at herself.

"I know" Kashal sighed. "I haven't missed you either. Does that make us awful people?"

"No Kash" she replied, reaching over the table to take his hand. "I think we're finally seeing what everyone else has seen for a while."

After their revelation, they both seemed to relax. They ate dinner, had a real conversation for the first time in years and actually enjoyed each other company.

As they waited for the check, the conversation about their marriage struck up again.

"So what do you want to do?" Kashal asked. "Do you want a divorce?"

"We should, shouldn't we? If that's how we feel?"

"Could we wait?" Kash asked. She couldn't hide the confusion on her face and he continued to talk. "It's just the firm loves the family image. You know, family run and all? Could we work something out do you think?"

"Like what?" she asked, feeling a little disappointed.

"Like you could stay in California, we'll tell everyone you're finishing your residency. Then when the time comes that you're meant to join me, we can say we've drifted apart?"

"Are you for real?!" she exclaimed.

"Please Aud" he said, almost begging. "They couldn't fire me if we separated but I'm sure they'd look at me differently."

"So I'm meant to live like a nun?" she asked incredulously.

"No difference from the last year" he replied flatly. "And it'd be the same rule for me. I promise."

"Why do I do this to myself?" she muttered. "Sure Kash" she replied.

"Thank you Audrey" he smiled. "I appreciate it."

"Sure, let's go" she said, feeling flat.

"Of course" Kashal replied. "You can take the bed, I'll take the couch tonight" he said, not picking up on her mood.

'Story of my life' she thought, with a sigh.

X

Neil's Friday night was taking a very different direction. The group had agreed on a calmer evening not to spoil the plans they had made for the Saturday so were still around the pool bar in the early evening.

The group of ladies that arrived with Neil had just arrived and were certainly dressed for a night out. As they passed by the bachelor party, a number of heads turned and Nicola caught Neil's eye. He nodded and smiled before his attention was diverted by his friends hollering.

"He's been here half a day and he's already getting all the attention" one of them laughed giving him as friendly nudge.

"It's not like that" Neil protested. "She just seemed a bit overwhelmed earlier on the van. Nice to see she's enjoying" he smiled.

"It must be so tiring being so nice all the time" one of the others joked causing the group to laugh out loud.

"Exhausting" he replied, laughing along with them.

The ladies ordered a round of flamboyant looking cocktails and were sitting around a couple of tables nearby. So far they were keeping themselves to themselves until he felt a tap on his shoulder.

He looked up to see Nicola looking down at him, standing a little awkwardly and looking nervous.

"You ok?" he asked.

"Yeah" she said quietly. "Can I ask you a favour please?"

"Sure" he replied and stood up as she nodded to a quieter corner.

"What's up?" he asked with a smile.

"So" she started. "I've agreed to do their dares" she sighed. "Don't judge, I know" she said putting her hand up.

"Okay" he smiled. "What do you need?"

"I need to kiss you" she said quite plainly and laughing a little as he choked a little on his beer.

"So they're starting out with a bang then?"

She nodded.

"I know it's stupid, but if I do this, they'll leave me be for the rest of the night. They want me to just kiss a stranger and you seemed nice and normal, and you wouldn't get the wrong idea about it" she garbled on. "I'm worried they'll just get worse if I don't humor them."

He put his hand on her arm to get her attention and she went quiet.

"I've got no problem kissing a beautiful woman" he smiled. "But do I count as a stranger? You do know my name remember?"

She blushed again. "I checked, it's fine" she said quietly. "This is waaaaaaay out of my comfort zone" she continued. "I had to make sure."

"Okay, in that case, I think I'm ready" he teased. "Do your worst" he smiled.

She cleared her throat but didn't move. He raised his eyebrow and gave a little smile.

"You ok?" he asked for the second time that evening.

"Yeah" she replied. "I'm just... you know."

"Would it still count if I kissed you?" Neil asked.

"I suppose" she replied quietly, nodding.

He put his beer down on the table, took her face in her hands and lowered his lips to hers. Her kissed her gently and smiled against her lips as she began to respond. Her hands came to rest on his upper arms and she stepped a little closer towards him.

"Think that'll be ok" he murmured against her lips.

"I think that should keep them quiet" she whispered back. "Thank you" she said as she turned and headed back to her friends.

He stood a moment before re-joining his friends. He hasn't kissed anyone in a while, not for the want of trying, and he'd rather enjoyed it. Maybe he'd enjoy this weekend more than he thought.


	21. Chapter 21

Saturday morning, Audrey was gathering her things ready to leave. She had a flight at lunchtime and would get a late breakfast near the airport with Laura. Her evening with Kashal had ended quite quickly after dinner and she retired to the bedroom as soon as they'd arrived back at the apartment. She didn't feel like sitting around and making any more small talk.

She couldn't help comparing the place to Neil's apartment back in San Jose. The layout was quite similar, but this was bland and impersonal. She knew he'd only been there a little over a week, but there wasn't even a picture of her or a personal item to be seen. Neil's place was full of life, photographs of his family, nik-naks from here and there and his bedroom, well his bedroom was just him. Masculine, strong and smelt amazing - she laughed to herself at that last point. Since when had she cared how Neil smelt!

She lay back on the rumpled covers and stared at the ceiling, trying to drop off to sleep. Thoughts raced through her mind but she eventually drifted off and by the time she woke the next morning, Kashal had already left. A note by the coffee machine was the only evidence that another person had been in the apartment at all. It simply said 'Thanks'.

Laura picked her up dead on time and they drove back to Dulles chatting as they went. They found a themselves a nice spot for breakfast and Audrey set to filling her in on her dinner with Kashal.

"I can't believe you agreed to that!" Laura exclaimed. "What were you thinking?"

"I don't know" Audrey replied shaking her head. "I suppose I thought I'd help him out."

"Why?! Do you think you'll change your minds if you give each other some space? Maybe realise you miss each other?"

"I doubt it" Audrey said, sounding a little sad. "I've just never really failed at anything before. I mean, I got a B once in High School, but I soon fixed that. It's just not in my nature to fail at anything."

"Well I think your lucky to have gotten this far Aud" Laura said sympathetically. "Maybe marriage isn't your thing? Serious relationships take work which you're not willing to put in."

"Wow! That's harsh" Audrey exclaimed sitting back in her seat.

"Am I wrong?" Laura continued , like a dog with a bone, she was not letting go. "If you had both worked as hard on your marriage as you did on your studies, things could have been very different."

Audrey just looked at her friend and nodded.

"Your probably right" she said quietly. "Relationships don't come naturally to me. All this talk of feelings makes me uncomfortable and I could quite happily go without" she said sadly.

"I know. I'm sorry if I upset you, bit I hate seeing you like this. So unsure of yourself" Laura said, moving her seat a little closer and taking Audrey's hand.

"It's fine" she replied. "I mean, it's not fine, but it's fine, you know?"

"Yeah sure" Laura said smiling. "And you're right. You suck at talking about feelings."

Laura waited with Audrey until it was time to go through security to departures.

"It was so good to see you, Laura. Thanks for taking such good care of me" Audrey smiled as she embraced her friend.

"Any time" Laura replied. "Maybe we don't leave it so long next time though, please?"

"Absolutely not. I'll let you know if I get any offers" she days pulling back a little and looking at her friend.

"When you get offers more like" she smiled. "And we'll figure out how to turn them down together."

Audrey smiled, a big genuine smile which brightened her eyes and made her cheeks glow.

"I love you, you know that right?" Audrey said.

"I love you too."

X

Saturday in Las Vegas was quite different. Neil and his friends were heading out into the sunshine for a day of what they had dubbed "manly activities".

Neil had arranged a morning at the gun range, which turned very competitive very quickly. As it turned out, Neils steady hands made him an exceptional shot much to the delight of the group. Another reason to roast Mr. Perfect!

Next was a ride in a helicopter (or two) to lunch at the bottom of The Grand Canyon. He'd been in touch with the tour operator and got them to switch out the champagne lunch for beers much to the delight the party. None of them were fans of the champagne lifestyle so the change suited them perfectly.

"This is brilliant Neil" Adam said as they sat eating lunch. "Such a good day."

"No worries brother, you deserve the best" Neil replied smiling.

"I'm glad you could make it, you know. It wouldn't have been the same without you. I definitely wouldn't be this sober" Adam continued. "What made you change your mind?"

"I just thought I should be here, being best man and all" he started.

"I call bullshit" Adam laughed. "You were stuck working, then suddenly you weren't?" he jibed.

"Honestly! I sold my soul to the devil" Neil chuckled. "I'm working every weekend between now and the wedding to pay it back."

"No way! That's gotta play havoc with your love life" Adam teased.

"Chance would be a fine thing" Neil laughed.

"The well has dried up since you and Jessica split, has it?" one of the other guys piped up, overhearing the last part of their conversation.

"Funny, funny" Neil replied, rolling his eyes. "You guys gossip like girls!"

"Seriously though man, if you're having girl trouble, the rest of us are doomed" another added with a raucous laugh.

They sat enjoying the views and the beers a little while longer until the pilots announced that it was time to head back. They snapped their last few photographs and strolled back towards the helicopters.

"Seriously, Neil" Adam started as they hung back a little. "Are you alright?"

"Yes mate, I promise. Just needed a break and some fun with my friends. I'll be fine" he smiled.

"Is it woman trouble?" he asked, not letting it drop.

"You could call it that" Neil laughed not going into further detail. Adam stopped still and just looked at him until he cracked. "I told someone how I felt and got shot down in a ball of flames! I just needed some time and some fun, so here I am."

"Well I'm glad" Adam said clapping him on the back. "About the trip, not the woman thing, of course.'

"Of course" Neil repeated as they climbed back into their seats.

X

Audrey landed on time back in San Jose and as promised, Kevin and Jo were there to meet her in Neil's clapped out old car.

"How did it go?" "Are you hungry?" came the simultaneous questions.

"One at a time" she laughed. "Let's get dinner and I'll fill you in on everything."

"Sounds great" Jo said, linking their arms and pulling her off to the car.

Sat close together at a half decent steakhouse, Audrey filled them in on the events of the last couple of days. Both of them were delighted to hear that she was intending on rejecting any offers she received and she'd be around for at least another year.

"Your friend Laura sounds very wise" Jo said nodding. "I'd like to shake her hand."

"Only because she said what you wanted to say" Kevin teased.

"Pretty much" Jo confirmed. "Like I said, very wise."

They sat and laughed and enjoyed their dinner happy in the knowledge that their little group would be whole for another year.

Eventually the subject the two of them had actively been avoiding came up when Audrey asked "Have you heard from Neil, is he having fun?"

They looked at each other, then back at Audrey.

"We've not heard from him" Jo said and it wasn't technically a lie. They hadn't spoken, but they had seen him featured heavily in social media tags by his friends and her looked like he was having a great time.

Audrey was not a subscriber to social media just yet and they were grateful for that. They weren't sure how she'd feel seeing Neil locked in an embrace with a dark haired lady captioned 'Mr. Perfect in action!' They weren't particularly happy about it, but if Audrey was going to stay married she couldn't expect him to wait around, could she?

"Do you think he'd like a lift from the airport tomorrow?" she asked them. "I could borrow his car?"

"I'm not sure Aud, I think he booked a transfer otherwise he'd have asked one of us. He knows we've borrowed his car" Jo said trying to put her off.

"True" she agreed. "I'm going to look forward to telling him everything on Monday."

"Everything?" Kevin asked.

"Yes" said Audrey innocently.

"Even about your plans to divorce?"

"Yes" she said confidently. "Maybe he'll be willing to wait a little longer? Laura said if I want something, I've got to put some effort into it" she said excusing herself to use the bathroom.

"Maybe Laura isn't as smart as I thought" Jo said shaking her head after Audrey was out of earshot.

"This could go horribly wrong" Kevin agreed said as her took a long drink from his glass.

X

Saturday continued in Vegas just as it started with the group of friends laughing and having the best of times together. Their afternoon was spent at some batting cages before heading back to freshen up for a nice steak dinner and a night in a club.

They had tickets for XS at The Wynn so were dressed to impress. Smart trousers and short sleeve shirts were the order of the evening and they had all scrubbed up very well indeed. They had a cabana table booked with bottle service and were very much enjoying being looked after by their servers.

They spilt off into smaller groups as the night went on. Some were dancing up a storm on the dance floor, others were propping up the roulette tables and a couple were sat out by the pool, having taken off their shoes and dangling their feet in.

Adam, Neil and two others were sat outside at their cabana, having drinks and people watching. Neil felt a hard nudge in his side from Adam who was nodding his head in an attempt to subtly draw his attention to a group that had just arrived poolside. It was the ladies from their hotel.

"Invite them over" Adam said. "They're good fun."

"You do it, it's your party" one of the others argued back.

"Fine" he said as he sat more upright and waved. He caught their eye and they headed over towards them. The guys found themselves sitting up a little taller and straightening their shirts as Adam invited them to join them at their table.

Once again, the group gradually broke apart even further and left just Neil and Nicola sat at the table, sipping their drinks.

"This is starting to feel like a set up" Nicola smiled into her drink after they had moved to sit next to each other.

"Seems so" he smiled back. "That ok? We can go find some of the others if you like?"

"It's fine" she said shyly.

"Good."

They sat comfortably passing the time, catching up on the events of the day. He found that they had spent the day in the spa, and recovering by the pool while the boys had been out all day.

"Want to go dance?" he asked after a lull in the conversation.

"Not really my kind of music" she said. "I like things a bit more relaxed. What about you? Your favourite music?"

"Most things to be honest. But I'll tell you a secret" he said leaning closer to whisper in her ear. 'I do like a bit of county, but that's classified."

She looked at him with a smirk. "Country?!"

"Ssshhh" he joked, looking around. "You can take the boy out of Texas and all" he shrugged making her laugh out loud.

He liked it when she smiled, and he liked it more when it was him that made her smile. 'What the hell' he thought to himself and he closed the last few inches between them and kissed her.

He felt her tense for a brief moment and smiled into the kiss as he felt her relax. They moved closer as and his hand came to rest in her thigh which made her tense again. He stopped.

"Is this okay?" Neil asked, resting his forehead against hers.

"It is" she said. "It's just, you know. I don't normally do this."

"Kiss strangers?" he smiled.

"Pretty much" she said s little shyly.

He sat back to give her some space and held out his hand. "Neil Melendez, nice to meet you" he smiled cheekily.

"Nicola James" she said shaking his hand. "And I feel like an idiot. I'm sorry."

"No need" he smiled, taking another swig of his beer. "Like I said before, it's your party. You should do what you want."

She laughed and shook her head as she mumbled something into her glass. He just looked, eyebrow raised questioning her.

"Sorry, I didn't catch that" he said.

She sat forward again and cupped his chin. "You weren't meant to" she smiled as she leaned in to kiss him again.

X

They woke early the next morning tangled in bed sheets and each other. After stretching slowly, Neil pulled the warm body next to him closer and he felt her smile against his chest.

"Morning" she mumbled.

"Good morning" he replied.

"Is this going to be weird?" she asked quietly. "I've not really done this before."

He untangled them just enough to scoot down so he could see her properly. She had one arm tucked under her like a pillow and had a nervous look on her face.

"It doesn't need to be weird at all" he said dropping a brief kiss on her lips getting a smile in response. "And if it makes you feel better, this isn't something I do every weekend either."

"I wouldn't mind doing it again though" she said letting her free hand rest on the stag head tattoo on his upper chest.

"My pleasure" he replied closing the gap between them again.

When they woke for the second time that morning, they were much more relaxed and familiar around each other. Nicola seemed to have gotten over her initial apprehension and didn't seem so keen to get rid of him. She even offered to make him a coffee while her grabbed a shower.

Walking out into the sitting area of the suite looking for his shirt which had been discarded in the heat of the moment, he was met with hushed whispers from the rest of the occupants.

"Morning" he said giving them a small smile as he headed towards Nicola and his coffee. "Thank you" her smiled as he took the steaming cup from her hands and took a sip.

"So are you guys going to swap numbers then? Or are you done with your plaything Nic?" one of her friends asked.

He watched her blush again at the suggestion.

"I don't think so" she said. "This was just a holiday thing, right? Besides, you live in Texas, it's not exactly a short hop to visit!" she said casually.

"No I don't" he replied shaking his head, watching the confusion cross her face.

"You said last night 'you can take the boy outta Texas'?" she said slowly.

"Yeah" he replied slowly. "Take out, as in moved when I was a teenager. I live in San Jose" he smiled, looking a little bemused.

"Oh" she said quietly, her face falling.

"Yeah, oh" he smiled awkwardly at her reaction.

"You should probably go" she said, taking the still hot coffee cup from his hand.

"Erm, sure, okay" he replied, unsure what he was meant to do next. After a few seconds, which felt like a lifetime to both of them, he leaned and kissed her cheek before he turned and left.

Closing the door behind him, he stood a moment outside the suite trying to figure out what had just happened. He shook his head and started walking back to his room.

"Neil!" he heard as he waited for the elevator. He turned to see one of Nicola's friends coming towards him. "I'm glad I caught you" she smiled as she approached. "Can I have your number?" she asked casually.

She laughed at the shocked look that crossed his face and jumped back in before he could object.

"Not like that! She's going to regret what she's just done. I want to help her out 'if' she wants to call you." The was particular emphasis on the 'if' which made him smile. "We're from Salinas. She was fine until she realised you only lived an hour away."

"And not in Texas" he said.

"And not in Texas" she confirmed with a laugh.

"Okay then" he said as he took the cell phone she was offering. He typed in his number and handed it back. "Thanks" he smiled.

"No promises mind" she reminded him. "Just in case."

"I get it, don't worry" he smiled and as of on cue, the elevator doors opened and he stepped inside.

"See you around? Maybe?" he said as the doors closed.

"Maybe!" he heard.


	22. Chapter 22

It was another few days until their shifts aligned and they saw each other for the first time since he dropped her home. He hadn't asked their friends after her, he hadn't called or texted to see how her interviews had gone and she had felt his absence from her life more than she had expected too.

She couldn't be sure, but she had a feeling that he was actively avoiding her but she did her best not to dwell on it. She did not want to believe that.

She saw him across the cafeteria with his back to her. He was sat alone eating his lunch, his head down, more than likely reading some journal article and she took a moment to appreciate his profile. With his strong shoulders and his perfect hair he still carried the air of arrogance he'd arrived with almost two years ago but it suited him and had hot him noticed by the people that mattered. She decided she was going to join him and made her way through the seats until she was stood right next to him. He was oblivious to her presence, totally absorbed in the print on the page and startled slightly as she cleared her throat.

"Hi" she started. "Do you mind if I join you?"

"Hi. Sure, no problem" he replied as he closed the journal cover and put it onto the seat next to him.

She unloaded her tray and took her seat feeling a little awkward as neither of them said a word.

"How was your trip?" came in unison, talking over each other. They stopped again, smiled and let out a little laugh which released some of the tension. "Good" they said together, laughing again.

"You first" Audrey smiled. "How was Vegas?"

He paused briefly before he began, not sure whether to tell her everything. Or even how he would tell her everything.

'It was awesome" he started. "Weather was great and so good to catch up with the guys. I didn't realise it had been so long."

"Did Adam enjoy?"

"He had a ball. It's all getting a bit real for him now, only six weeks to go. He's excited and nervous at the same time" he smiled, recalling some of the conversations he and Adam had over the weekend. He filled Audrey in on the activities they'd been up to, conveniently missing out any information about female company.

"Good" she replied. "Those six weeks will fly by, time seems to be going a lot quicker the older we're getting" she smiled.

"You're telling me" he smiled. "I swear we only started here last week. Definitely doesn't feel like we're almost into our third year."

She nodded. She was working up the courage to tell him about the talk and the agreement with Kashal when he pushed the point to the forefront, changing the conversation to her weekend.

"How were your interviews?" he asked, even though he didn't really want to know if Audrey was moving to the other side of the country.

"They went really well" she smiled. "I got offers from both places on Monday" she confirmed.

"The was no doubt" he replied with a hint of sadness in his voice. "Who are you going with?"

"Neither" she said bluntly. "I rejected them both."

His heart lurched in his chest and a took a sharp breath.

"Why?" he asked, looking a little confused.

"I'm staying here" she replied. "It seems Kash and I finally want the same thing, so we talked. We came up with a plan."

"What kind of plan?" Neil asked apprehensively, with absolutely no idea of what was coming.

"He stays in Washington, I stay here" she started. "He's agreed we will divorce but not for a couple of years. His firm loves the wholesome family image and he doesn't want to be in the spotlight for the wrong reasons. We're going to say my residency won't allow me to move, and when the time comes to join him, we'll have drifted apart, hence the divorce."

He didn't know what to say but he had no doubt that his face was conveying his emotions quite well.

"We were just saying how fast time was going by, it'll fly by" she said, trying to reassuring him of something without saying it directly. She had lost her nerve when met with silence from him, and couldn't bare to ask him outright to wait for her.

"So you're going to stay married?"

"Yes."

"On opposite coasts?"

""Yes, for now."

"Oh" came the blunt response.

Even after she'd talked it over with her other friends, it hadn't hit her how stupid the idea actually sounded out loud until right this moment. Until she sat in front of Neil explaining this away, thinking she was just helping Kashal. But once again, it was to her detriment.

"Neil, I'm sorry" she said quietly.

"Me too" he replied looking down at his plate. "Another two years is a long time, you know. I'm assuming you're going to carrying on living as if you're married?"

"I'm sorry, I just..." she nodded.

"I wish you had a little more faith in me" Neil interrupted almost in a whisper. "One night stands aren't really my thing, that's not what this would have been for me. We could have had something special, I know it and I'm sorry that you didn't feel the same."

"I'm sorry..." she started again.

"Think we'll be able to stay friends?" he asked, interrupting her again. "I don't think I'd like it if you weren't in my life" he said, making her gasp a little.

To have such a personal and emotional conversation in such a public place meant their reactions were stifled but looking at each other, they could see that they were both deeply affected by the words being exchanged.

He put his hand out on the table, mirroring hers with their fingertips touching so lightly that they could barely feel it, but it was there.

"We'll be great friends" she smiled, hoping the sadness she felt didn't show. "We can still catch a few movies maybe? We could go watch Thor when it comes out if you think you can stay awake this time" she teased trying to lighten the mood.

"We could do that" he smiled, imagining his face showing similar emotion to Audrey's. "I'd like that. Besides, I get the funny feeling this won't be the last time we have this conversation so we need to get used to it" he said, smiling.

Their hands were still barely touching when they heard a commotion from behind them.

"Hey you two" Jo said as she recovered from the trip she had just taken. She'd caught her foot on chair leg and stumbled to regain her balance, somehow not spoiling a drop of her coffee anywhere.

In the brief distraction, Neil covered Audrey's hand with his, giving it a light squeeze before letting go as Jo dropped into the spare seat next to her.

"You guys good?" she asked innocently.

"Catching up on our weekends" Audrey replied. "Hearing some bachelor party tales" she smiled causing Jo to raise her eyebrows.

"Not all the dirty details" Neil laughed nervously, catching Jo's eye and shaking his head. "Nobody needs to hear that."

""Oh, no thank you" Audrey laughed. "Too much information" not knowing exactly what they had meant.

The three friends sat for a short while, exchanging jibes and gently teasing each other until Neil's phone lit up, making it vibrate across the table. He peered at it, not recognising the number and debated with himself whether to answer it.

"Who's that?" Jo asked innocently.

"Telemarketer maybe?" he replied.

"That's a private number" Audrey confirmed turning it to look. "Answer it."

"Hello" he said, sounding cautious until he heard the voice at the other end of the line and they could see his features soften as he listened.

"Hi Nic, give me two secs" he said as he raised his hand to the others, got to his feet and headed off to find some privacy.

They watched him leave, Audrey quite innocently and Jo cringing inside. Then she heard the words she'd dreaded.

"Who's Nic?"


	23. Chapter 23

Neil sat on a bench outside the front doors to take the call for some semblance of privacy. He didn't feel ready to explain this to Audrey, especially when he didn't know what this actually was.

"Sorry about that" he said, taking a seat. "Just wanted to get somewhere a little quieter."

She could hear him smiling over the phone and imagined his eyes twinkling and his cute little dimples showing.

"That's ok" she replied. "How has work been after a weekend of partying? Not too hard going?"

"Not to bad. Could have been a lot worse" he laughed. There was no sound from the other end of the line until he asked "You okay?"

"Yes, I'm sorry" she replied. "I didn't know whether I should call or not to be honest. And I still don't know if I've done the right thing."

"Why not?"

"Because effectively, you're a stranger and I'm usually shy" she said with a nervous laugh.

"We don't have to be strangers you know" he suggested. "What do you want to know?"

"Erm, quite a few things but I don't want to quiz you and sound like a stalker" she smiled. "This is all quite new for me. I've not seen anyone since my divorce. I feel... awkward" she said.

"Would you rather do this face to face? We could meet half way? Neutral territory?" he suggested.

She paused before answering "Okay, that sounds good. When were you thinking?"

"I get off work on Monday next?" he suggested.

"But it's Friday today" she exclaimed. "What on earth do you do?" she asked.

"I'll tell you Monday" he laughed. "Come on, let's do it. Where's halfway?"

"Around Gilroy?" Nic suggested. "Not very exciting though" she said with a small laugh.

"It'll be fine" he said. "We'll make our own fun! You pick the place, text me a time and I'll be there."

"Deal" she replied.

"Was good to hear from you" Neil said as they were about to end the call. "I'm glad you called."

"Me too" she replied. "See you Monday."

"It's a date" he smiled.

He sat a moment longer after the call ended, lost in his thoughts when someone sat down so heavily beside him, he almost dropped his phone.

"What are you doing, you idiot?" Kevin asked actually sounding frustrated. "Jo told me you were out here talking to your fancy woman!"

"Fancy woman? Really?" he laughed.

"Do you deny it?" Kevin continued.

"No I don't!" Neil replied, a little worried his friend had gone mad. "What's going on?"

"I was just thinking you're making a mistake" he said bluntly.

"Me!?" Neil replied incredulously. "Enlighten me then please Dr. Miller? What's so wrong with a single man talking to a single woman he met on a weekend away?"

"But Audrey..." he began.

"But Audrey what" Neil retorted. He wanted to yell but it was not the time or the place. "She's just finished telling me about her grand plan. How she's put Kashal before herself again. There is only so much of that I can take, I'm sorry"

Kevin opened his mouth to reply but Neil didn't give him the chance to form a single word.

"What does she expect from me? To wait for her until she's ready? I've tried more than once to tell her how I feel and I've been shot down every time. I don't expect her to cheat on her husband, that's not the best way to start a relationship. But if she's not willing to have some faith in me, then screw it. I've been unceremoniously dumped in the friend zone and I'm done. I work my ass off in this place, I deserve a life" he ranted before getting up and stalking back inside.

Kevin sat, shocked, trying to absorb what Neil had just said. Until that point he had still held our some hope for his friends, but right now, that was gone.

X

He stormed past Jo in the foyer and took the stairs at a jog. She watched him go assuming the phone call had gone badly. She would find out differently from Kevin later just what had happened.

As he took the corner to the locker room at pace, he collided with her almost knocking her to the ground.

"Jeez Aud, I'm sorry!" he exclaimed. "You okay?"

"I'm fine" she replied. "You don't look to great though. What's eating you?"

"Nothing" he snapped, immediately regretting it. "I'm sorry" he repeated, his shoulders slumping. "We need to talk some more, I don't think we're done."

"Sure, you free now?" she asked, feeling a little apprehensive.

"Yes, let's go" he said, taking her hand and leading her to the fire escape.

Out in the fresh air, Neil seemed to visibly relax but not sure where to start, he just looked at her. He looked into her eyes, she looked confused with a hint of sadness and he felt a pang of guilt that he was possibly about to make that worse.

"I don't know where to start" Neil began.

"Start at the beginning" Audrey said gently. "What's wrong?"

"I met someone" he started. "In Vegas" he continued, looking to the ground unable to look her in the eye anymore.

"Okay" she replied. "Why has that made you so angry?"

"I don't know!" he exclaimed. "I just felt you should know."

"Thanks, I think" she said with a small smile. "What's her name?"

"Nicola" he replied. "She's from Salinas."

"And she's nice?"

"Seems to be. We don't really know each other. But we're going to meet up Monday to see if there is anything there. I just felt you should know."

"Okay" she said quietly.

"Is it okay though?" he asked.

""Why wouldn't it be? We're just friends" she said.

"You know why" he implored. "This is harder than I thought it would be" he muttered to himself.

"Just say it" she pushed.

"Were you expecting me to wait for you?" he asked quietly.

"Yes" she admitted. "Deep down, I was hoping?"

"For years Aud?"

"I know, it's stupid."

"Yes, it is" he said bluntly and feeling bad as he saw tears brim her eyes. "Look at us, we're a mess" he said running his hand through his hair. "How did we end up like this?"

"I think it was teamwork" she smiled ruefully and he nodded his agreement.

"I shouldn't have pushed you" he said.

"And I shouldn't have let you" she replied. "I'm not good at the whole relationship thing. I've never really had one before Kashal and I didn't know how to deal with this thing we have between us. I've never been cool or popular, nobody has ever wanted me before."

He shook his head in disbelief. "We need to sort this out, we can't carry on like this" Neil continued. "We need to define our relationship and stick to it."

"I agree" she said. "We can't afford to let this get in the way of our work. We're still residents, and personally, I don't want a get a reputation for being difficult to work with."

"You're right, as always" he smiled. "Think we can do this?"

"We've got to" she replied. "Let's give each other some space, work it out and we'll be fine."

"You sure?"

"I am" she said trying to sound confident. "But can I ask one favour?"

"Anything" he replied.

"I don't want any details" she said apprehensively, not sure if this was one request too many. "Unless it gets serious, can we not talk about your dating life?"

"Sure" he smiled sadly. "I can do that."

"Then we'll be fine" she said, turning to face outwards, putting her arms on the railings and leaning slightly to peer over the edge.

"We'll be fine" he repeated. "Shall we go? They're probably wondering where we are?"

"You go ahead, I'll be down in a bit" she answered, not looking at him.

"Aud..." he began.

"I'll catch up with you later" she said cutting him off and with that he turned and headed back downstairs.

Once alone, she let out a big breath she didn't realise she'd been holding. "I blew it" she sighed to herself, letting a tear fall down her cheek.

She stayed a while longer to compose herself and cool down. She didn't want people seeing the super cool and collected Audrey Lim any other way and by the time she walked back into the hospital, she was wearing her mask again.


End file.
